Bridget the Midget
Ray Stevens

Well the wife went out of town 'bout a year or so back

And left me at home by myself to batch

And after five straight nights of TV I was ready to scream

So I called up this beer drinkin' buddy of mine

I said, Bill, I ain't havin' a real good time

He said, Why don't we go to the rasslin' matches

And let off a little steam?

The main event was the Spider from parts unknown

With his trusty partner, the Blue Cyclone

They was takin' on a team that never had been beat

Now I'd never seen the matches before

And the crowd was backed up plumb out the door

But me an' ol' Bill lucked out and got ringside seats

Well then they rang the bell and all Hell broke loose

My legs was shakin' like a rubber goose

I'd never seen anything like this, not even in the war!

The Cyclone put the Vulture in an airplane spin

Then he body slammed him and he did it again

I swear, I didn't see how that old boy could take much more

It was right about then in the thick of things

My buddy Bill threw a chair in the ring

And that's when I knew we'd better be headin' for the door

'Cause I saw the Cyclone lookin' at us

And he was rubbin' his head and he started to cuss

And I knew if he caught us he'd break Bill's neck for sure

Well, where we parked wasn't too far

And Bill ran so fast he beat me to the car

Locked the doors and wasn't about to let anybody in

And I turned around and the Cyclone was there

And he said, Hey punk, you forgot your chair!

And by the look in his eyes, I knew that this was the end

Then he body slammed me two or three times

And he put his arms around me from behind

Then he pile drived me right there in the hard concrete

Broke both my arms and three of my ribs

It's the closest, I've ever come to being killed

And that's the last thing, I remember 'fore he put me to sleep

Blue Cyclone

Blue Cyclone

Well, I woke up in a hospital bed just thinkin'

I believe I coulda took him if I hadn't been drinkin'

So the next time we meet, I won't be on no binge

'Cause I hadn't been the same since we had that fight

And I see that Cyclone in my dreams at night

And I'll never be satisfied 'til I get revenge

So I called up Bill and told him my plan

And all he said was, Right on, man!

I'd do the same darn thing if it'd been me

It all happened so quick when that car door slammed

It must a broke somethin', 'cause the door locks jammed

You was already down, he's gone time I got free

Bill said, Since you're thinkin' 'bout takin' him again

I know two ol' boys that weigh 210

They'd take on a grizzly with a switch in the woods at night

Well, we talked it over, they said they's willin'

They'd stop at nothing, short of a killin'

Said, Hoss, we'll back you as long as you wanna fight

So we all went down to the Hammerlock Bar

The hangout of all the rasslin' stars

And waited for the Blue Cyclone to hit the door

Well, after a while, he finally appeared

And sat down at the bar and ordered a beer

And he barely took a sip 'fore I stepped to the middle of the floor

I yelled, Hey Cyclone! Remember me?

I'm the guy you put to sleep

Only this time, you can see I'm not alone, ha ha

You see them two big dudes over there?

The Cyclone looked and said, Over where?

And I turned around, I'm a son of a gun, they was gone!

Well, the Cyclone looked at me and grinned

He said, Okay punk, here we go again

Seems to me that some guys never learn

And then he waded through them tables and chairs

Put a full-nelson on me and grabbed my hair

And when he threw me to the floor, I was startin' to get concerned

The next thing I remember, they was carryin' me in

And the doctor said, Oh no, you again?

I said, Doctor, how long you think it'll be this time?

He said, Boy, if you don't leave the Cyclone alone

One of these days, you ain't goin' home!

You'll need the undertaker's services, not mine

Blue Cyclone

He's the meanest wrestler the ring has ever known

He'll make you groan, he'll make you moan

He'll lay you prone and break your bones

Blue Cyclone

The Blue Cyclone


  Purchase "Bridget the Midget"   Purchase Entire Album   Email Video to Friends   Play Youtube "Bridget the Midget" Video   Play Spotify "Bridget the Midget" Song   View Wikipedia "Bridget the Midget" Entry   Receive Emails for Future Ray Stevens Lyrics

Email:

  Link to "Bridget the Midget"   Share on Facebook, Twitter, and more
  See Recommended Lyrics For You

Loading...

Lyrics by Ray Stevens

  \   A Handshake Will Do   Ahab The Arab   Ahab The Arab Popeye and Olive Oil   All the Way   Along Came Jones   America, Communicate With Me   Bad Little Boy   Ballad Of The Blue Cyclone   Be Your Own Best Friend   Blue Christmas   Bridget The Midget (The Queen Of The Blues)   Chickie-Chickie Wah Wah   Cholly Wolly Chang Chang   Come to the U.S.A.   Cow-Cow Boogie   Dear Andy Griffith   Erik the Awful   Everything Is Beautiful   Family Funeral Fight   Five More Steps   Fly Over Country   Freddie Feelgood   Freddie Feelgood (And His Funky Little Five Piece ...   Funny Man   Further More   Gitarzan   Hang Up and Drive   Harry the Hairy Ape   Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas   Hearts Made Of Stone   Hello Mama   Help Me Make It Through The Night   Hermit Named Dave   High School Yearbook   Hugo The Human Cannonball   I hear our President talkin   I Need Your Help, Barry Manilow   I Saw Elvis In A U.F.O.   I'll Be Home For Christmas   I'm My Own Grandpa   I'm My Own Grandpaw   I'm My Own Grandpa   If 10% Is Good Enough For Jesus   If Ten Percent Is Good Enough For Jesus   Indian Love Call   Irish Builder   It's Been So Long   It's Me Again Margaret   It's Me Again, Margaret   It's Me Again Margaret   Jack Daniels You Lied To Me Again   Jambalaya   Jeremiah Peabody's Polyunsaturated Quick-Dissolvin...   Jingle Bells   Julius Played the Trumpet   Kings And Queens   Kiss A Pig   Kitty Cat's Revenge   Knock Him Out John   Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow   Little by Little   Little Egypt   Makin' The Best Of A Bad Situation   Makin' The Best Of A Bad Situation   Mama Sang Bass   Marion Michael Morrison   Midnight In Baghdad   Missippi Squirel Revival   Mississippi Squirrel Revival   Mississippi Squirrel Revival (1985)   Misty   Moonlight Special   Mr Businessman   Mr. Businessman   My Dad   Nashville   Nightmare Before Christmas   Obama Nation   Osama Yo Mama   Osama Yo' Mama (Alternate Version)   Osama-Yo-Mama   Over the Rainbow   Pfc Rhythm and Blues Jones   Purple People Eater   Rang Tang Ding Dong I'm The Japanese Sandman   Rock and Roll Show   Rockin' Boppin' Waltz   Safe at Home   Sant Claus Is Watching You   Santa Claus Is Watching You   Santa Claus Is Watching You   Santa Clause Is Watching You   Saturday Night at the Movie   Scratch My Back (I Love It)   Sergeant Preston Of The Yukon   Sgt Preston Of The Yukon   She Belongs To Me   She Came in Through the Bathroom Window   Shriner's Convention   Shriner's Convention (1980)   Shriner's Convention   Silver Bracelet   Sittin' Up with the Dead   Sittin' Up With The Dead   Solar Powered Song   Southern Air   Speed Ball   Stand Up   Sunday Mornin' Comin' Down   Sunday Mornin' Comin' Down   Sunday Morning Comin' Down   Surfin' U. S. S. R.   Surfin' U. S. S. R.   Thank You   That's What She Means To Me   The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone   The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone (The Beginning)   The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone (The End?)   The Baptism of Stumpy Brown   The Battle Of New Orleans   The Camping Trip   The Cat Song   The Deoderant Song   The Deodorant Song   The Fool on the Hill   The Global Warming Song   The Haircut Song   The Mississippi Squirell Revival   The Pirate Song   The Preacher And The Bear   The Streak   The Streak (1974)   The Tender Trap   There Must Be A Pill For This   Three Fractured Factions   Throw The Bums Out   Too Drunk to Fish   Turn Your Radio On   Unwind   Vacation Bible School   Virgil And The Moonshot   Walkin' the Dog   We Are The Government   We The People   What Would I Do Without You   Who Do You Love?   Would Jesus Wear a Rolex   Xerox Xmas Letter   Yakety Yak   You Are So Beautiful   Young Love   Your Bozo's Back Again   Your Bozo's Back Again

Related Songs

  Trapped In the Closet (Chapter 10 of 12)...  Trapped In The Closet (Chapter 10) - R Kelly  Trapped in the Closet (Chapter 11) - R. Kelly  Trapped in the Closet (Chapter 10) - R. Kelly  All Heads Turn - The Rollo Treadway  Trapped In The Closet (Chapter 11) - R Kelly  Trapped In the Closet (Chapter 11 of 12)...  Memorex CDs - Hodgy Beats  Kill The Director - Wombats  Daydream Believer - Midget  My Song For You - Bridgit Mendler  Bridget - The Gourds  Love Song - Alice In Chains  Trapped In The Closet (Chapter 9) - R Kelly  Trapped in the Closet Part 9 - R Kelly  Trapped in the Closet Part 9 - R. Kelly  Midget - Devo  Lesbian Eskimo Midget Left-Handed Ninja Albino...  Sarah Jean - Dead Milkmen  The Midgets Lament - Dory Previn  Saint Bridget and the Holy Prepuce - Balaam's Ass  Act Like That - Bridget Kelly  Tim Westwood Freestyle - Eminem  Sugar - Amelle Berrabah  Mickey - The Mumbling Midget - Residents  Trapped in the Closet (Chapter 9) - R. Kelly  Trapped In the Closet (Chapter 9 of 12) - R. Kelly  If I Owned A Midget - Benefit  Mickey -- The Mumbling Midget - The Residents  Take The World - Katy B  Hot Squat Homber - Corky And The Juice Pigs  Street Dreamin - Funkmaster Flex  Bridget's Pill - Christy Moore  Bridget's Pill - Christy Moore  The Midget's Lament - Dory Previn  Now Everybody's Me - The Dead Milkmen  Midget Saw - Alestorm  Bridget Flynn - The Irish Rovers  Bridget O'Malley - Silly Wizard  Bridget Riley - Death by Chocolate  Bridget Flynn - Irish Rovers  The Midget Pissed - Wolf Cookie  Kilkelly (Cedric's Farewell) - Bedlam Bards  Bubblin' - Cru  Let Me Hold You (Little Man) - Dewey Cox  At The Circus - Unbunny  Ticket out - Midget Handjob  No Regrets - Lovers  Midget Submarines - Swell Maps  Midget Sings - Severed Heads  Tennessee Midget - Training For Utopia  Iron Midget - Anti Tank Nun  Midget Cough - Action Bronson  For the Love of You - Bridget  What It Is (remix) - Gorilla Zoe  Its Active Feat (feat. Mr. Midget Loco) ...  Hero - Bill  Martini Please - Bridget Metcalfe  Jane - Bill  Even Dwarves Started Small - R.a. The Rugged Man  City Port - Marc Bolan and T. Rex  City Port - T. Rex  a picture of dorian gray...  Chonkyfire Freestyle - Eminem  Froggy Went A Courting - Mike Oldfield  Walk Away - K\'S CHOICE  Walk Away - K'S CHOICE  Walk Away - Ks Choice  A Picture Of Dorian Gray - Futureheads  I See Why - Que  Barbarella - Paul Baribeau  My Time - K Koke  Trapped In The Closet (Chapter 8) - R Kelly  Trapped in the Closet (Chapter 8) - R. Kelly  Trapped In the Closet (Chapter 8 of 12) - R. Kelly  10 Foot Midget - Project: Bad  Still Fighting - 3 Doors Down  Coldvenience - Rotten Sound  Small Grip of Love - The High Sox  Even Dwarfs Started Small - R.A. the Rugged Man  Fun Things To Fuck (If You're A Winner) - NOFX  I Got The Goods - Lady Sovereign  Garbage Pail Kids - Benefit  Confessions [#][*][Demo Version] - Violent Femmes  Confessions, Pt. 2 - Chai T  Confessions [DVD] - Violent Femmes  (These Are My) Confessions - Hit Crew  Confessions Part III - Weird Al Yankovic  Confessions, Pt. 2. [Remix][*] - Usher  Confessions, Pt. 2 - Hit Crew  Ready To Catch Him - Bridget Metcalfe  On The Beach - Bridget Metcalfe  The Magdalene Laundries - The Chieftains  Magdalene Laundries - Joni Mitchell  Not Of This Earth - Robbie Williams  Bridget Kelly – Street Dreamin - Kendrick Lamar  Wanna Dance? - Bondage Fairies  Fuck The B.S. - Nicki Minaj  The Best Time Of My Life - Bridget Metcalfe  Brid Og Ni Mhaille \/ Brigit O'Malley...  Last Man At The Party - Jethro Tull  Common As Muck - Ian Dury & The Blockheads  Do it - Bridget Kelly  Different Drum - Bridget Ball  Smackwater Jack - Bridget Academy  O Little Town of Bethlehem - Bridget Ball  It Came Upon a Midnight Clear - Bridget Ball  Street Dreamin - Bridget Kelly  Seek And Destroy - Bridget Kelly  Thinking About Forever - Bridget Kelly  Goosebumps - Bridget Kelly  Special Delivery - Bridget Kelly  Friends - Bridget Kelly  The Mouth - Bridget Kelly  In the Morning - Bridget Kelly  Every Girl - Bridget Kelly  Stranger to Love - Bridget Kelly  Love You After All - Bridget Kelly  Coca1n3 Heartbreak - Bridget Kelly  Seek & Destroy - Bridget Kelly  In The Morning (Remix) - Bridget Kelly  S#1t Happens - Bridget Kelly  I Won't Cry - Bridget Kelly  I Want My Shit - Insane Clown Posse  I Want My Shit - ICP (Insane Clown Posse)  Confessions Part III - Weird Al Yankovic  Confessions Part III - Weird Al Yankovic  Confessions Pt 2 - Usher  Midget in a Junkyard - Sparklehorse  Limp Bizkit Think They're Black, but They're Just ...  Mutilated Lips - Ween  Kiss That Girl (from Bridget Jones Diary soundtr...  Stupid Over You - Screeching Weasel  Wild Billy's Cirkus Story - Bruce Springsteen  Wild Billy's Circus Story - Bruce Springsteen  You're My Favorite Star - Bellamy Brothers  Hollywood Kiss - Emerson Drive  Joining the Circus - The Vindictives  Wrap Her Up - John Elton  Common As Muck - Ian Dury & The Blockheads  Rubbermonks and Leathernuns - Nekromantix  Leo Song - Pacifier \/ Shihad  Where - Migos  Those I Hunt - Black Vector  Trapped In The Closet (Chapter 12) - R Kelly  Trapped in the Closet (Chapter 12) - R. Kelly  The Magdelene Laundries - Joni Mitchell  The Magdalene Laundries - Joni Mitchell  Sidewalk Show - Curren$y  Hugs - The Lonely Island  Street Dreamin (Feat. Bridget Kelly)...  Identity:Crisis - I The Breather  What It Is - Gorilla Zoe  What It Is - Rick Ross  Status: Choke - Brainiac  Stand - Al Denson  Leo Song - Pacifier / Shihad  we love you - The Psychedelic Furs  We Love You - Psychedelic Furs  The Lonely Island HUGS featuring Pharrell & Tatian...  You're Best Friend Is You - Anal Cunt  Courtney - Clarks  Bearded Lady - Hives  Cowboys & Aliens - Gram Rabbit  Stand! - Sly And The Family Stone  Tall Midget (vin Rock Diss) - Treach  Stand - Sly & The Family Stone  Leo Song - Shihad  Chris Barnes Is A Pussy - Anal Cunt  Small Boy Jumps - Rasputina  Queen Bee and Her Pals - Thurston Moore  Queen Bee And Her Pals - Moore Thurston  Dennis & Lois - Happy Mondays  Crazy English Teacher - Nick Gill  Trapped In the Closet (Chapter 12 of 12)...  Courtney - The Clarks  Shit (Remix) - Kevin Gates  Apollo 3-1-5 - Gym Class Heroes  Mutilated Lips [*][Multimedia Track] - Ween  Platinum Blonde - Paris Hilton  The Magdalene Laundries - With Joni Mitchell...  That Yu Fi Run - Elephant Man  Hot Topic - Le Tigre  The Cypher Of Bread & Butter - Canibus  "Stop, Look, Listen" - Bridget Jones' Diary  Out of Reach - Bridget Jones' Diary  Someone Like You - Bridget Jones' Diary  Stop, Look, Listen (To Your Heart)...  All By Myself - Bridget Jones' Diary  Kiss That Girl - Bridget Jones' Diary  Ask Me No Questions - BRIDGET ST. JOHN  The Road Was Lonely on My Own - BRIDGET ST. JOHN  Barefeet and Hot Pavements - BRIDGET ST. JOHN  The Curious Crystals of Unusual Purity ...  Hello Again (Of Course) - BRIDGET ST. JOHN  I Like to Be with You in the Sun ...  To B Without a Hitch - BRIDGET ST. JOHN  Early Morning Song - BRIDGET ST. JOHN  Like Never Before - BRIDGET ST. JOHN  If You'd Been There - BRIDGET ST. JOHN