Hello Mama
Ray Stevens

[Mama]

Hello?

[Osama]

Hello Mama, This is Osama.

I'm in a geisha house in Yokohama.

I swear I don't know nothing 'bout no tennis shoe bomb.

I'm a nervous wreak, W's breathin' down my neck.

[Mama]

Goodness me, mercy sakes.

Listen son, what on Earth are you thinking?

[Osama]

I don't know

[Mama]

Tell me something, have you been drinking?

[Osama]

No! I aint been drinking.

[Mama]

This aint no way to behave you're gonna send me to my grave!

[Osama]

Hold it Mama! You know I can't talk long at all,

W just might trace this call. Wait a minute. Uh Oh!

[W]

We will not tire. We will not fail.

However long it takes you know we will prevail.

[Mama]

Mercy Sakes

[Osama]

Mama I don't wanna go. To Guantanamo.

So Mama send me some dough. Another hundred million or so.

I think it's worse than dead broke. Down in Guantanamo.

[Mama]

Hello?

[Usama]

Hello Mama, This is Usama

I'm in a mud hut in the middle of Uganda.

Now here's the thing I changed my name to Usama

Yeah, 'cause W's nipping at my heels.

Now I know how Salman Rushdie feels.

[Mama]

Goodness me, mercy sakes.

Listen son I'm not trying to upset you.

[Usama]

I know

[Mama]

But honey if they do catch you.

[Usama]

Oh for goodness sakes bite your tongue!

[Mama]

You know it's every mother's prayer, you have on clean underwear.

[Usama]

Hold it Mamma! W just wont leave me alone, I think he might of tapped this phone.

Wait a minute. Uh Oh!

[General]

We will not tire, we will not fail.

Do not pass GO just go directly to Jail.

[Mama]

Goodness me!

[Osama]

Mama I don't wanna go. To Guantanamo.

So Mama send me some dough. Another hundred million or so.

I think it's worse than dead broke. Down in Guantanamo.

{repeat and fade}

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Lyrics by Ray Stevens

\ A Handshake Will Do Ahab The Arab Ahab The Arab Popeye and Olive Oil All the Way Along Came Jones America, Communicate With Me Bad Little Boy Ballad Of The Blue Cyclone Be Your Own Best Friend Blue Christmas Bridget the Midget Bridget The Midget (The Queen Of The Blues) Chickie-Chickie Wah Wah Cholly Wolly Chang Chang Come to the U.S.A. Cow-Cow Boogie Dear Andy Griffith Erik the Awful Everything Is Beautiful Family Funeral Fight Five More Steps Fly Over Country Freddie Feelgood Freddie Feelgood (And His Funky Little Five Piece ... Funny Man Further More Gitarzan Hang Up and Drive Harry the Hairy Ape Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas Hearts Made Of Stone Help Me Make It Through The Night Hermit Named Dave High School Yearbook Hugo The Human Cannonball I hear our President talkin I Need Your Help, Barry Manilow I Saw Elvis In A U.F.O. I'll Be Home For Christmas I'm My Own Grandpa I'm My Own Grandpaw I'm My Own Grandpa If 10% Is Good Enough For Jesus If Ten Percent Is Good Enough For Jesus Indian Love Call Irish Builder It's Been So Long It's Me Again Margaret It's Me Again, Margaret It's Me Again Margaret Jack Daniels You Lied To Me Again Jambalaya Jeremiah Peabody's Polyunsaturated Quick-Dissolvin... Jingle Bells Julius Played the Trumpet Kings And Queens Kiss A Pig Kitty Cat's Revenge Knock Him Out John Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow Little by Little Little Egypt Makin' The Best Of A Bad Situation Makin' The Best Of A Bad Situation Mama Sang Bass Marion Michael Morrison Midnight In Baghdad Missippi Squirel Revival Mississippi Squirrel Revival Mississippi Squirrel Revival (1985) Misty Moonlight Special Mr Businessman Mr. Businessman My Dad Nashville Nightmare Before Christmas Obama Nation Osama Yo Mama Osama Yo' Mama (Alternate Version) Osama-Yo-Mama Over the Rainbow Pfc Rhythm and Blues Jones Purple People Eater Rang Tang Ding Dong I'm The Japanese Sandman Rock and Roll Show Rockin' Boppin' Waltz Safe at Home Sant Claus Is Watching You Santa Claus Is Watching You Santa Claus Is Watching You Santa Clause Is Watching You Saturday Night at the Movie Scratch My Back (I Love It) Sergeant Preston Of The Yukon Sgt Preston Of The Yukon She Belongs To Me She Came in Through the Bathroom Window Shriner's Convention Shriner's Convention (1980) Shriner's Convention Silver Bracelet Sittin' Up with the Dead Sittin' Up With The Dead Solar Powered Song Southern Air Speed Ball Stand Up Sunday Mornin' Comin' Down Sunday Mornin' Comin' Down Sunday Morning Comin' Down Surfin' U. S. S. R. Surfin' U. S. S. R. Thank You That's What She Means To Me The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone (The Beginning) The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone (The End?) The Baptism of Stumpy Brown The Battle Of New Orleans The Camping Trip The Cat Song The Deoderant Song The Deodorant Song The Fool on the Hill The Global Warming Song The Haircut Song The Mississippi Squirell Revival The Pirate Song The Preacher And The Bear The Streak The Streak (1974) The Tender Trap There Must Be A Pill For This Three Fractured Factions Throw The Bums Out Too Drunk to Fish Turn Your Radio On Unwind Vacation Bible School Virgil And The Moonshot Walkin' the Dog We Are The Government We The People What Would I Do Without You Who Do You Love? Would Jesus Wear a Rolex Xerox Xmas Letter Yakety Yak You Are So Beautiful Young Love Your Bozo's Back Again Your Bozo's Back Again

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