Southern Air
Ray Stevens

Southern Air, Southern Air

If you're flying down to Dixie you won't find a cheaper fair

Southern Air, Southern Air

Yeah they'll treat you like kinfolks

but you better have time to spare.

(Spoken)

Yeah, there I was. I'd just stepped on board flight number 78492100976 5432 82765....7. Flying non stop from Heyhiward, Georgia to Yazoo City, Mississippi. Done bought me one of them triple ultra super saver center sleep tickets. Set down there between a duck and a Ledbetter. Fella tried to talk to me, couldn't understand a word he was sayin, sounded like a log truck. Duck didnt say nothin. All of a sudden I hear this voice comin in over the intracom...

Capt Clower: This here is Capt Jerry Clower. Whooo! I wanta welcome all y'all to Southern Air. We'll be ready for takeoff shortly, just as soon as they clear the runway.

(Mooing)

There was a gun rack in the cockpit

It beat all I'd ever seen

They had complimentary copies of Mechanics Magazine

We peeled rubber on the runway,

Looking out my window screen

I saw an et more possum bumper sticker

Stuck out on the wing

Southern Air, Southern Air

Flying high over Dixie

Going where no others dare

Southern Air, We're Southern Air

Yeah we'll take you to your kinfolks

But you better have time to spare.

Spoken: Yeah, there I was. must have been 500 feet over them pine trees. Duck had done fainted on takeoff. Had his little head layin on my arm there, his little tongue just all hangin out. We flew past Stone Mountain, crossed that Alabama state line, got so close to Enterprise you could almost see that Boll Weevil wine. This I heard this sharp ringin in my ear...

Stewardess: Howw Deee! My name is Miss Pearl and I'll be your stewardess for the duration of this flight. As you can see Capt Clower has turned off the NO CHEWIN sign. Now y'all feel free to kick your shoes off, get up, roam around, get to know your neighbors. Right now I just want to get to know this good looking, handsome young hunk of man right cheer...

She served Nehis, Moon Pies, bowls of butter beans. Gone with the Wind was skippin on that movie screen

While Marcelle, Claudelle, Raynell, Eunell

Clovis and Eugene were all taking turns at the churn

Turnin out peach ice cream.

Southern Air, we're Southern Air

Flying high over Dixie

Country comforts in the air

Southern Air, Southern Air

If you're dyin to see your kinfolks

Well you better have time to spare.

Spoken: Yeah, there I was. That Miss Pearl was givin me more attention then she did that first class passenger. Kept showin me all the new safety tips and playin with my seatbelt. Got me so nervous I dropped my last piece of pecan pie right on that duck's head. That little feller come to and jumped up a-quacking and a-squallin, didnt know where he WAS. Started runnin up and down the aisle, tripped over the ice cream freezer, stepped in Marcelle's sweet potatas and flew out the screen door and was GONE! Nuthin but feathers. Then I heard that voice again comin in over the intracom...

Capt. Clower: I can see Yazoo City from HEAH! Whoo! Now don't y'all fret about that landin none, I got up early this mornin and put on a brand new set of them big foot MUD grippin tires.

Through rain or shine, we stayed behind

Lord it was quite a show

How that duck beat us to Yazoo

Well i guess I'll never know

And that moony girl they called Miss Pearl

Just wouldnt let me go

While that Captain kept on talkin on his 2 way radio

Southern Air, Southern Air

Capt Clower: Uncle Mercy! Can you get them cows off the runway?

(Mooing)


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Lyrics by Ray Stevens

  \   A Handshake Will Do   Ahab The Arab   Ahab The Arab Popeye and Olive Oil   All the Way   Along Came Jones   America, Communicate With Me   Bad Little Boy   Ballad Of The Blue Cyclone   Be Your Own Best Friend   Blue Christmas   Bridget the Midget   Bridget The Midget (The Queen Of The Blues)   Chickie-Chickie Wah Wah   Cholly Wolly Chang Chang   Come to the U.S.A.   Cow-Cow Boogie   Dear Andy Griffith   Erik the Awful   Everything Is Beautiful   Family Funeral Fight   Five More Steps   Fly Over Country   Freddie Feelgood   Freddie Feelgood (And His Funky Little Five Piece ...   Funny Man   Further More   Gitarzan   Hang Up and Drive   Harry the Hairy Ape   Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas   Hearts Made Of Stone   Hello Mama   Help Me Make It Through The Night   Hermit Named Dave   High School Yearbook   Hugo The Human Cannonball   I hear our President talkin   I Need Your Help, Barry Manilow   I Saw Elvis In A U.F.O.   I'll Be Home For Christmas   I'm My Own Grandpa   I'm My Own Grandpaw   I'm My Own Grandpa   If 10% Is Good Enough For Jesus   If Ten Percent Is Good Enough For Jesus   Indian Love Call   Irish Builder   It's Been So Long   It's Me Again Margaret   It's Me Again, Margaret   It's Me Again Margaret   Jack Daniels You Lied To Me Again   Jambalaya   Jeremiah Peabody's Polyunsaturated Quick-Dissolvin...   Jingle Bells   Julius Played the Trumpet   Kings And Queens   Kiss A Pig   Kitty Cat's Revenge   Knock Him Out John   Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow   Little by Little   Little Egypt   Makin' The Best Of A Bad Situation   Makin' The Best Of A Bad Situation   Mama Sang Bass   Marion Michael Morrison   Midnight In Baghdad   Missippi Squirel Revival   Mississippi Squirrel Revival   Mississippi Squirrel Revival (1985)   Misty   Moonlight Special   Mr Businessman   Mr. Businessman   My Dad   Nashville   Nightmare Before Christmas   Obama Nation   Osama Yo Mama   Osama Yo' Mama (Alternate Version)   Osama-Yo-Mama   Over the Rainbow   Pfc Rhythm and Blues Jones   Purple People Eater   Rang Tang Ding Dong I'm The Japanese Sandman   Rock and Roll Show   Rockin' Boppin' Waltz   Safe at Home   Sant Claus Is Watching You   Santa Claus Is Watching You   Santa Claus Is Watching You   Santa Clause Is Watching You   Saturday Night at the Movie   Scratch My Back (I Love It)   Sergeant Preston Of The Yukon   Sgt Preston Of The Yukon   She Belongs To Me   She Came in Through the Bathroom Window   Shriner's Convention   Shriner's Convention (1980)   Shriner's Convention   Silver Bracelet   Sittin' Up with the Dead   Sittin' Up With The Dead   Solar Powered Song   Speed Ball   Stand Up   Sunday Mornin' Comin' Down   Sunday Mornin' Comin' Down   Sunday Morning Comin' Down   Surfin' U. S. S. R.   Surfin' U. S. S. R.   Thank You   That's What She Means To Me   The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone   The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone (The Beginning)   The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone (The End?)   The Baptism of Stumpy Brown   The Battle Of New Orleans   The Camping Trip   The Cat Song   The Deoderant Song   The Deodorant Song   The Fool on the Hill   The Global Warming Song   The Haircut Song   The Mississippi Squirell Revival   The Pirate Song   The Preacher And The Bear   The Streak   The Streak (1974)   The Tender Trap   There Must Be A Pill For This   Three Fractured Factions   Throw The Bums Out   Too Drunk to Fish   Turn Your Radio On   Unwind   Vacation Bible School   Virgil And The Moonshot   Walkin' the Dog   We Are The Government   We The People   What Would I Do Without You   Who Do You Love?   Would Jesus Wear a Rolex   Xerox Xmas Letter   Yakety Yak   You Are So Beautiful   Young Love   Your Bozo's Back Again   Your Bozo's Back Again

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