Makin' The Best Of A Bad Situation
Ray Stevens

Now, I know a man
He's a hard workin' man
He gets up real early, and he goes down town
And about fifteen minutes after he's been gone
There's a big milk truck pulls up on the lawn
And that milkman rushes up to the door
Where that man's wife is waitin' in a kimona
And she plants a big ol' kiss on his cheek and they go inside
And that truck never moves for an hour or two
Well it's none of my business
One day I called him aside and told him what was goin' on
While he was gone
And he said, Well I guess that's so, but do you know
We're never outta' milk or cottage cheese or yogurt,
Ice cream, or none of them other cowy things

I guess he's makin' the best of a bad situation
Don't wanta make waves, can't you see
He's just makin' the best of a bad situation
Reckon I'd do the same if it was me

Now I know a man, he's an educated man, he's an alligator wrestler
He jumps right in there and grabs them long green boogers by whatever you grab them long green boogers by
Well, one day he's got a full Nelson on this big alligator
When this other alligator sneaks up and bites his right ear plumb off
Didn't bat an eye just crawled off in the shade and went to sleep
The alligator not the man
Well, it's none of my business
One day I said, Well, it's sure too bad about that little accident that you had

'Cause now your hat's gonna fall down over your eyes
And you can't ever be gypsy 'cause you don't have no place to wear a gold earring
He just looked me right straight in the eye and said,
Huh?

I guess he's makin' the best of a bad situation
Don't wanna make waves, can't you see
He's just makin' the best of a bad situation
Reckon I'd do the same if it was me

Now I know a lady, she's a mighty fine lady
Got a heart of gold, she wouldn't hurt a fly
She's just tryin' to get by and keep her house in order
But you know that her husband, he worked so hard that he come unglued
He come unwrapped, he just snapped, thinks he's a chicken
That's right, one of them cackling Colonel Sanders' types
He roosts in the bush by the side of the house
Well it's none of my business but one day I said
Have you ever thought about findin' him a doctor who could make him well
And she said Well, I have now and then, but then again
He don't eat much just chickenfeed and all that peckin' in the ground don't hurt nothin'
Heaven knows, we can use the eggs

I guess she's makin' the best of a bad situation
Don't wanna make waves, can't you see
She's just makin' the best of a bad situation
Reckon I'd do the same if it was me

We're all just makin' the best of a bad situation
We're all in this together you and me


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Lyrics by Ray Stevens

  \   A Handshake Will Do   Ahab The Arab   Ahab The Arab Popeye and Olive Oil   All the Way   Along Came Jones   America, Communicate With Me   Bad Little Boy   Ballad Of The Blue Cyclone   Be Your Own Best Friend   Blue Christmas   Bridget the Midget   Bridget The Midget (The Queen Of The Blues)   Chickie-Chickie Wah Wah   Cholly Wolly Chang Chang   Come to the U.S.A.   Cow-Cow Boogie   Dear Andy Griffith   Erik the Awful   Everything Is Beautiful   Family Funeral Fight   Five More Steps   Fly Over Country   Freddie Feelgood   Freddie Feelgood (And His Funky Little Five Piece ...   Funny Man   Further More   Gitarzan   Hang Up and Drive   Harry the Hairy Ape   Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas   Hearts Made Of Stone   Hello Mama   Help Me Make It Through The Night   Hermit Named Dave   High School Yearbook   Hugo The Human Cannonball   I hear our President talkin   I Need Your Help, Barry Manilow   I Saw Elvis In A U.F.O.   I'll Be Home For Christmas   I'm My Own Grandpa   I'm My Own Grandpaw   I'm My Own Grandpa   If 10% Is Good Enough For Jesus   If Ten Percent Is Good Enough For Jesus   Indian Love Call   Irish Builder   It's Been So Long   It's Me Again Margaret   It's Me Again, Margaret   It's Me Again Margaret   Jack Daniels You Lied To Me Again   Jambalaya   Jeremiah Peabody's Polyunsaturated Quick-Dissolvin...   Jingle Bells   Julius Played the Trumpet   Kings And Queens   Kiss A Pig   Kitty Cat's Revenge   Knock Him Out John   Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow   Little by Little   Little Egypt   Makin' The Best Of A Bad Situation   Mama Sang Bass   Marion Michael Morrison   Midnight In Baghdad   Missippi Squirel Revival   Mississippi Squirrel Revival   Mississippi Squirrel Revival (1985)   Misty   Moonlight Special   Mr Businessman   Mr. Businessman   My Dad   Nashville   Nightmare Before Christmas   Obama Nation   Osama Yo Mama   Osama Yo' Mama (Alternate Version)   Osama-Yo-Mama   Over the Rainbow   Pfc Rhythm and Blues Jones   Purple People Eater   Rang Tang Ding Dong I'm The Japanese Sandman   Rock and Roll Show   Rockin' Boppin' Waltz   Safe at Home   Sant Claus Is Watching You   Santa Claus Is Watching You   Santa Claus Is Watching You   Santa Clause Is Watching You   Saturday Night at the Movie   Scratch My Back (I Love It)   Sergeant Preston Of The Yukon   Sgt Preston Of The Yukon   She Belongs To Me   She Came in Through the Bathroom Window   Shriner's Convention   Shriner's Convention (1980)   Shriner's Convention   Silver Bracelet   Sittin' Up with the Dead   Sittin' Up With The Dead   Solar Powered Song   Southern Air   Speed Ball   Stand Up   Sunday Mornin' Comin' Down   Sunday Mornin' Comin' Down   Sunday Morning Comin' Down   Surfin' U. S. S. R.   Surfin' U. S. S. R.   Thank You   That's What She Means To Me   The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone   The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone (The Beginning)   The Ballad of the Blue Cyclone (The End?)   The Baptism of Stumpy Brown   The Battle Of New Orleans   The Camping Trip   The Cat Song   The Deoderant Song   The Deodorant Song   The Fool on the Hill   The Global Warming Song   The Haircut Song   The Mississippi Squirell Revival   The Pirate Song   The Preacher And The Bear   The Streak   The Streak (1974)   The Tender Trap   There Must Be A Pill For This   Three Fractured Factions   Throw The Bums Out   Too Drunk to Fish   Turn Your Radio On   Unwind   Vacation Bible School   Virgil And The Moonshot   Walkin' the Dog   We Are The Government   We The People   What Would I Do Without You   Who Do You Love?   Would Jesus Wear a Rolex   Xerox Xmas Letter   Yakety Yak   You Are So Beautiful   Young Love   Your Bozo's Back Again   Your Bozo's Back Again

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