Samuel and Rosella,Both were eighty-two years old.Sharing an umbrella,Slowly down the street they strolled.And all around the world was changingIn a manner of ways ranging.From dialect to fashion,The state of affairs,Absolutely clashin’ withThe world that was theirs.“I don’t understandThese kids today,” said Rose.“Yeah,” responded Sam,“Take a look at this boy’s clothes.”The young man exiting Hot TopicMade them feel so misanthropic.Samuel and RosellaDidn’t like the way he dressed.They closed their umbrellaAnd they rammed it through his chest. Samuel and Rosella, They hate your generation With such determination. Samuel and Rosella, They are disgusted, knowing How wrong this world is going, A fact they don’t mind showing. In fact right now they’re blowing up the local mall. And off they hobble, drunk on Geritol. Now after beingIn love for sixty years,They were both agreeingThat the end was drawing near.So, why not cause a little trouble?Who’d suspect a sweet old couple?Rose was always saying,“That kid’s gotta go.”Samuel was obeying,Never saying no.Sam was a disaster,When she smiled his heart still flipped.Who’d imagine afterSixty years he’d still be whipped?But nonetheless she loved him dearly.They’d hold hands while cavalierlyBurning baggy jeansIn the middle of a shop,Or killing silly teensFor listening to the hippedy hop. Samuel and Rosella, They hate your generation And music video station. Samuel and Rosella, They are disgusted, knowing How wrong this world is going, A fact they don’t mind showing. In fact right now they’re blowing up the local mall. And off they hobble, drunk on Geritol. Off they hobble, drunk on Geritol. These kids today, with their sleepy expressionsAnd their Satanic tattoosAnd their running around in the arcade parlorsAnd their shiny gold “blam blam” or whatever they call itAnd their dangerous skateboardsAnd their Chef BoyardeesAnd their dang-fangled computer machines teaching them how to make bombsAnd their iFrogs or whatever they call itAnd their automobiles with the wheels that look like they’re still spinning when they stopAnd their trenchcoatsAnd their colorful tee-shirts with the Marxist propaganda on themAnd their thong sandalsAnd their Britney Spears’s husbandsAnd their powdered wigsAnd their peg legs with decals on ‘emAnd their low-carb dietsAnd their Rockin’ the VoteAnd their collectible bottle capsAnd their tiny little cameras inside the tiny little portable telephonesAnd their “For Shizzle McFizzley Ding Dong Dizzle” Snoopy Dog languageAnd their general disrespect towards their elders,Well they can burn in hell, I say, every last one of them! Samuel and Rosella, They hate your generation With such determination. Samuel and Rosella, They are disgusted, knowing How wrong this world is going, A fact they don’t mind showing. In fact right now they’re blowing up the local mall. And off they hobble, drunk on Geritol. (Off they hobble, drunk on Geritol.) Off they hobble, drunk on Geritol.
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