On the first day of Christmas my company gave to meA pink slip for under the treeOn the second of Christmas my company gave to me2 days to packAnd a pink slip for under the treeOn the third day of Christmas my company gave to me3 Bic pensIs that right 2 days to pack?And a pink slip for under the treeOn the fourth day of Christmas, I gave my company4 letter words3 more pensWell I’m gonna take this lamp too, thenAnd a pink slip for under the treeOn the fifth day of Christmas my company gave to me5 days of sleep4 letters words3 bic pensAnd this stapler and my coat rack and…A pink slip for under the treeOn the sixth day of Christmas, my company gave to meSix months of Cobra5 days of sleepWake up you freaking monkey, it’s almost break time!Oh, thanks. Is the roach coach here yet?And a pink slip for under the treeOn the seventh day of Christmas my company gave to me7 check a –bouncingOh, dear!6 months of Cobra5 days of sleepI got your bonus right here!3 lousy pensI’m calling securityAnd a pink slip for under the treeOn the eighth day of Christmas my company gave to me8 hours of drinkingI have never bounced a check in my life5 day of sleepYou big Goofbag!Bunch of Sticky notesCan I at least keep thee pocket protector?And a pink slip for under the treeOn the ninth day of Christmas my company gave to me9 cans a cat food8 hours of drinkingCould you not breathe on me please?I can’t afford Cobra5 days of sleep4 festive words3 Bic pensOnly 2 days to packAnd a pink slip for under the treeI got a blue oneOn the tenth day of Christmas my company gave to me10 workers weeping,There, there missy, it’s gonna’ get a lot worse than thisGod, I hope my kids don’t get sickWant some cat food?5 days of sleepBite me! Do I hear sexual harassment?Would you help me carry this copier to my car, please?And a pink slip for under the treeOn the eleventh day of Christmas my company gave to meEleventh hour pleading10 workers weepingYou know I know a guy that’ll hire all three of you girls, sight unseenAnd you get to work with a cobra, imagine that!5 days of sleep4 letter wordsI ‘m warning you!Can’t we all just get along?And a pink slip for under the treeOn the twelfth day of Christmas my company gave to me12 employees bummingI know girls, I knowSay, you girls need a ride home? I got my par carked right out front?Five days of sleepI gave this place the best years of my life and they gave me the shaft!And a pink slip for under the treeTree? What tree? We’re not gonna be able to afford a tree!
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