The Golden Kiss
Shel Silverstein

It was a drizzly, drinkin' Nashville night
And everything was wrong.
My beer was flat and the jukebox cranked out
Somebody else's song.
I turned my head and down the bar
Starin' straight at me
Was the dried upest, washoutest, ugliest creature
I never hoped to see.

She winked at me with one bloodshot eye,
Flashed a toothless smile,
And in a whiskey whisper said,
Boy, come and sit with me a while.
Wanna buy me a drink. No?...
Well, then I'll buy us both a pair.
She crossed her veiny legs and fluffied up
He orange hair.

She said, well, I guess you're a songwriter.
I've see your kind for years
Sniffin' around the edge of life
Hopin' you might hear
Some word or catchy little phrase
That you can steal for pay...
Somethin' the real poets, us common people,
Simply throw away.

So, how you doin' tiger?
Did you set this town on fire?
You got gold records on your wall?
You got a chauffeur diven car?
Oh, you say the town's against you?
And you're givin' up the fight?
Well, cheer up son and drink up,
'Cause tonight's your lucky night.

Now it's fate that you walked in this bar
And found me alone like this.
You got the hungries and the blues
And I got the Golden Kiss.
What is that you mall well ask.
Well, the gospel truth of it
Is the night I love a songwriter,
He ALWAYS writes a hit.

I mean a monster, a standard, a super smash.
Not just a number one.
But the kind the world will keep on singing
When we're dead and gone.
But to write that kind of masterpiece,
Some magic is essential,
So sit a little closer, son,
The next part's confidential.

I was with Hank the very night
He wrote Your Cheatin' Heart.
I Slipped Around with Floyd
And that song gave the boy his start.
You've heard Please Release Me.
These lips made Eddie write it
And El Paso came to Marty
Just a moment after I did.

Billy Edd wrote Jackson
'Cause we spent the weekend there.
Mooney scribble Crazy Arms
On a pillow case we shared.
P.D. woke up and looked at me
And wrote Mule Skinner Blues.
And Don left me at midnight
Mutterin' Born to Lose

Harlan spent the night and he go
Busted the next day.
Hank opened up his eyes and whispered
Make the World Go Away.
Yeah, Cryin' Time and Lonesome Me
It's an endless list.
And they were all wrote, note for note,
Because of this Golden Kiss.

Don't ask me how I do it, son.
I really do not know.
But anyway, we've had our dink.
You wanna head on home?
Well, I sat and stared a while
At that withered wasted wreck.
But Crazy Arms and Cheatin' Heart
Well, what the heck.
I took her home and, well,
Some things are better left unsaid
But I slept that night
With Golden records spinnin' through my head
But when I woke up next mornin'
There was no song in my mind.
She said, some get it right away, son...
Others take a little time.

Well, six months go by and then six years
Of those Golden Kisses.
Wakin' up with no ideas, no songs, or fame, or riches.
Then this mornin' lightnin' strikes.
A song that cannot miss.
I'll write a ditty about that biddy
With her Golden Kiss.

So here it is, the all-time smash
That's gonna make me rich.
And if it don't, I'm goin' home
And kill that lyin' bitch.


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Lyrics by Shel Silverstein

  (Pour Me Another) Tequila Sheila   $100,000 in Pennies   25 Minutes To Go   A Couple More Years   A Front Row Seat To Hear Ole Johnny Sing   A Front Row Seat to Hear Ole Johnny Sing [*]   Acapulco Goldie   Alimoney (Also recorded as "Alimony")   All About You   All The Time In The World   Aphrodisiac   Back Home In Huntsville Again   Beans Taste Fine   Better Not Ask Me   Beware Of Lovers   Bigtime   Blue Eyes   Boa Constrictor   Bottomless Well   Boy Named Sue   Bread Upon The Waters   Bury Me In My Shades   Carry Me, Carrie   Centaur   Changing of the Seasons   Civil War Song   Cloudy Sky   Cornflakes With Sugar And Teardrops   Cover Of The Rolling Stone   Daddy, What If?   Dance To It   Date In Dallas   Daylight Dreamer   Diet Song   Dirty Feet   Drain My Brain   Drop The Bomb   Drunk And Crazy   Everybody Got Some But Me (Rauncy Playboy Version)   Everybody Got Some But Me (Tame Recorded Version)   Father Of A Boy Named Sue   February Snow   First Battalion   Floobie Doobie Doo   Food Blues   Get Away   Get My Rocks Off   Go Back, Learn To Use That Thing   Goodnight Little House Plant   Goodnight, Little Houseplant   Gotta Get Rid Of This Band   Greasy Grit Gravy   Grizzly Bear   Hamlet As Told On The Street   Handy Man   Have Another Espresso   Help Me, Mama   Hey Nelly Nelly!   Hey, Lady Godiva   Hoodoo Voodoo Lady   I Call That True Love   I Gave Her Comfort   I Got Stoned and I Missed It   I Hear America Singing   I Never Got To Know Her   I Once Knew A Woman   In The Hills of Shiloh   Inside A Lion   It Does Not Pay To Be Hip   Jaded   Jennifer Johnson and Me   Judy   June 25th At The 4th Of July   Jungle To The Zoo   Just Came Down For The Weekend   Kick It Again   Killed By A Coconut   Kiss It Away   Liberated Lady 1999   Little Green Buttons   Living Legend   Liz   Lullabys, Legends And Lies   Marie Laveaux   Masochistic Baby   Me And Jimmie Rodgers   Mermaid   Michaelangelo   Midnight Sunshine   Modern Talk   Monterey Jack   More Like The Movies   Mountain Mary   My Next Impersonation   Never Be This Young Again   Never Bite A Married Woman On The Thigh   Numbers   Oh, You Engineer   On The Way To The Bottom   Paranoid   Pathetic Way Of Getting Over Me   Paul   Peanut Butter Sandwich   Peanut-Butter Sandwich   Penicillin Penny   Perfect High (Or The Quest For Gimmesome Roy)   Plastic   Polly In A Porny   Put A Little Bit On Me   Put Another Log On The Fire   Quaaludes Again   Queen Of The Silver Dollar   Raquel Welch   Red-Neck Hippie Romance   Rest Awhile   Rings Of Grass   Rock & Roll Hotel   Roland The Roadie And Gertrude The Groupie   Row, Row, Row   Sahra Cynthia Sylvia Stout Would Not Take The Garb...   Sausalito Witch   Scum Of The Earth   Show It At The Beach   Sing Me A Rainbow   Sing Us Some Of The Old Songs   Six Days Back At Home   So Good To So Bad   Somebody Stole My Rig   Someone Ate The Baby (Dreadful)   Stacy Brown Got Two   Standing On The Outside Of Your Shelter   Still Gonna Die   Sweetest Of All   Testing The Bomb   That Plane   The Avocado Tree   The Ballad of Lucy Jordan   The Clam   The Danger Of A Stranger   The Devil And Billy Markham   The Diet   The Diet Song   The Father Of The Boy Named Sue   The Giving Tree   The Great Conch Train Robbery   The Great Lakes Song   The Lady With The Torch   The Man Who Got No Sign   The Man Who Turns The Damn Thing Off And On   The Mermaid   The Mermaid Of Ontario   The Monkey And The Elephant   The Peace Proposal   The Perfect Wave   The Radio   The Slitheree-Dee   The Smoke Off   The Ugliest Man in Town   The Unemployment Line   The Winner   The Wonderful Soup Stone   They Held Me Down   Thirteen Tons of Ice Cream   This Guitar Is For Sale   Three-Legged Man   Thumbsucker   Time   Truck Driver, Truck Driver   True Story   True Story [#][*]   Turn On The World   Ugliest Man In Town   Uncle Don   Up On The Mountain   Vanilla   Vegas   Vegematic   Warm And Free   What Have You Dont For Me Lately?   When She Cries   Whiplash Will   Whistlers And Jugglers   With His Mouth Full Of Food   Yellow-Haired Woman   Yes, Mr. Rodgers   Yowzah!

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