Count the Ways
Honest Bob and the Factory-to-Incentive Dealers

My love is a telephone nYour love is an answering machine nTry to get a dial tone nYour call cannot be completed as dialed nnMy love is a leaf of spinach nYour spinach is a pot of tea nI can't find the coffee grinder nCould I just have a glass of milk? nnLet me count the ways that I loved you nLet me count the ways that you hurt me nLet me count the times I still think of you nI count eighteen thousand forty three nOne for every minute since you left me nnYour love is a broken record nMy love is a broken CD nIt's part of a new boxed set nIt's been digitally remastered nnMy love is a tube of toothpaste nYour toothpaste is a great-tasting gel nYou should really floss more often nSqueeze tube from bottom and flatten as you go up nnLet me count the ways that I loved you nLet me count the ways that you hurt me nLet me count the times I still think of you nI count eighteen thousand forty four nOne for every minute since you walked out that door nnI hate the bridge nI hate the bridge nI hate the bridge nI hate the bridge nI hate the bridge nI hate the bridge nI hate the bridge nI still love you nnMy love is an empty blackboard nYour love is a pile of chalk nYou come in many different colors nI think I lost the eraser nnMy love is a order of fries nYour ketchup is way too thick nHold the bottle upside down nI don't see fifty-seven varieties nnLet me count the ways that I loved you nLet me count the ways that you hurt me nLet me count the times I still think of you nI count eighteen thousand forty five nOne for every minute since you said goodbye

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Lyrics by Honest Bob and the Factory-to-Incentive Dealers

43 Reasons A Bullet in my Brain Acceptable After the Thunderstorm All of the Cool Girls Another Person You Had Sex With Any Day Now Beautiful Burn Chair Cocoon Country Mo-fo Don't Look Right Don't Want To Election Day Entangled Everybody Knows Ex-Girlfriend Fine Flyer Fool No More Guitar Hale-Bopp Hate To Love Heisenberg Hey Liz High School Crush Hit On You I Can Love You From Here I Don't Say Anything I Don't Want To Hear About Your Crappy Boyfriend I Get By I Push Her Buttons I Will Deny I Wish I Was Dead I Won't Find My Wife in This Bar I'm A Guy I'm So Embarrassed I'm Still Around In the Fridge Just Like That Leopold Let It Go Long Distance Relationship Lottery Love Defined Lunch Make Myself Not Care Make You Laugh Meaningless Sex My Dinner With Laurie Not Myself Today Nothing New To Say Organism Over You Playing It Over Pollard Saves The Day Purple Yesterday Recycle Me Red Integra Saag Paneer Scapegoat She Likes You She's a Terrible Artist She's Gone Shrimp in Limbo Shut Up Someone Who Looks Like You Sympathy Tatooine The Benefits of Language Time Cube

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