(spoken)
Well, look. Of course I appreciate your sincerity, your earnestness, your eagerness to please, but if you don't mind, hold out your hands, 'cause I'm gonna smack you with the ruler. And be grateful, because I've been known to urinate in people's mouths. I've been known to shit on faces. I've been known to wipe my nose on people's hair, and vomit directly into people's assholes. I'm very well-known for these things, so you would do well not to cross me. You could do worse than to obey my every whim. Because I have been known to chain people up in the basement and leave the television on a public access channel with the volume all the way up and the remote control just out of reach.
For I am a great and savage god, and I am most well-known, and if you don't believe me, well, you had just better start, because, as I have said, I have been known to use people as handkerchiefs and toilet tissue and toilet bowls, and not because I don't have my own, but because I am a god, and people only exist to serve gods.
If I desire a woman—and when I desire sexual gratification it is with a woman, exclusively, for I am not a gay god or a bi god, but a straight god—when I desire a woman, I take her. I may, if I wish, ask her out a few times, maybe cook a nice dinner, try to amuse her with my keen wit and shy demeanor, so as to put her in a more conducive mood. I may even treat her like a goddess if I wish. But only if I wish. And if I wish to use dildos or vibrators or oils or gels or leather masks or handcuffs or a rubber suit or a wooden ping-pong paddle or any other assorted implement, then that is what I shall do.
I am a god! And human customs and rules of decorum and propriety do not apply to me. (I am a god!) If I wish to eat horse meat or dog meat, even though I am a vegan god, I will do so. For that matter, if I want to fuck a young man up the ass or suck off somebody's grandfather, I will do that too, even though I am a straight god. And so on.
And it is so excellent to be a god, let me tell you: I don't have to pay for anything, I can park wherever I want, and people have to pray to me. It is a happy happy life, and I am oh-so-lucky to be a god.
I am a god!
I am a god!
I am a god!
The God
King Missile
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Lyrics by King Missile
(Why Are We) Trapped? A Good Hard Look All Things Everywhere And Another Political Poem Antimatter At Dave's Betrayal Takes Two Bloodletting Brains Will Explode Cheesecake Truck Chickens Clamsauce Clarity Transcending Choice Columbus Day Weekend Come Closer Commercial Damned If I Know Delores Despair Detachable Penis Dick Eating People Ed Empty Enjoy Your Tea Everybody Screams Inside Failure Farm Fish Fluting On The Hump Fourthly Francis Bacon Frightened And Freezing Garbage Party Gary And Melissa Get Down with the Funky Shit Get Into It (Roll Around in It) Glass Good Things Happiness Happy Hour Happy Note He Needed Heaven Heavy Holy Man Hemopheliac Of Love Hemophiliac of Love How Much Longer How To Remember Your Dreams I Dare to Hope I Wish I'm Sorry If Only Jesus Was Way Cool Jim Juniper Dog Knowledge Leather Clown Let's Have Sex Lies Life Listen To Me Lou Love You More Martin Scorsese Martin Scorsese (PG-13) Metanoia Monks Mr Johnson Mr. Pomerantz Mr. Story My Heart Is A Flower My Life My Lover My Personal Life Nietzsche Sneezes No Point Now Open Up Pain & Pleasure Phaedreaux Pickaxe Real Men Royal Lunch Scotland Sensitive Artist Sex With You She Didn't Want Shit Sink So Happy Socks Still the One Stonehenge Take Me Home That Old Dog The Absolute The Adventures of Planky The Birds The Blood Song The Box The Boy Made Out of Bone China The Bunny Who Wanted To Be A Rat The Chosen The Evil Children The Fish That Played The Ponies The Indians The Love Song The Miracle Of Childbirth The Neither World The Party The Sandbox The Spanish Armada The Story Of Willy The Trees The Way To Salvation These People Things To Walk Among The Pigs Tour Diary: Louisville Up My Ass Water What If When She Closed Her Eyes Wind-Up Toys Wuss Ww3 Is A Giant Ice Cream Cone
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