Natalie's Rap
The Lonely Island

[Parnell]

We're sitting here today with film star Natalie Portman.

[Portman]

Hello.

[Parnell]

So, Natalie, what's the day in life of Natalie Portman like?

[Portman]

Do you really want to know?

[Parnell]

Yes, tell us

[Portman]

I don't sleep motherfucker

Off that yak and Durban

Doing 120 getting head while I'm swerving

[Seth Meyers]

Damn Natalie you a crazy chick

[Portman]

Yo shut the fuck up and suck my dick

I bust in dudes mouth like gushers motherfucker

Roll up on NBC and smack the shit outta Jeff Zucker

(What you want Natalie)

[Portman]

To drink and fight

(what you need Natalie)

[Portman]

To fuck all night

Don't test when I'm crazy on that airplane glue

Put my foot down your throat

Till you shit in my shoe

Leave you screaming

Pay for my dry cleaning

Fuck your man

It's my name that he's screaming

[Parnell]

I'm sorry Natalie, but are we to believe you condone driving while intoxicated?

[Portman]

I never said I was a role model.

[Parnell]

What about the kids that look up to you? Do you have a message for them?

[Portman]

All the kids looking up to me can suck my dick

It's Portman mother fucker

Drink till I'm sick

Slit your throat

And poor nitrous down the hole

Watch you laugh and cry

While I laugh you die

And all the dudes

You know I'm talking to you

(we love you Natalie)

I wanna fuck you too

P is for Portman

P is for pussy!

I'll kill your fucking dog for fun so don't push me

[Parnell]

Well, Natalie I'm surprised. All this from a Harvard graduate.

[Portman]

Well there's a lot you may not know about me.

[Parnell]

Really? Such as?

When I was in Harvard

I smoked weed every day

I cheated every test

And snorted all the yay

I gotta a def posse

And you gotta buncha dudes

I sit right down on your face and take a shit

[Andy Samberg]

Natalie you are a bad ass bitch (hell yeah!)

And I always pay for your dry cleaning

When my shit gets in your shoe (What!?)

As for the drug use

Well I can vouch for that

My dick is scared of you

Girl

[Parnell]

Okie-doke. One final question,

If you steal a smooch from any guy in Hollywood,

Who would it

[Portman]

No more questions


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Lyrics by The Lonely Island

  100th Digital Short   3 Way   3-Way   3-Way (The Golden Rule [Video]   3-Way (The Golden Rule)   3-Way (The Golden Rule) [Edited Version]   3-Way (The Golden Rule) [Explicit Version]   After Party   Are Or Aren’t   Ashley Wednesday   Attracted To Us   Awesometown   Bing Bong Brothers   Bing Bong Brothers [DVD][*]   Boombox   Cocaine   Cool Guys Don't Look At Explosions   D*** in a Box   D*** in a Box [DVD]   D**k in a Box   D**k in a Box [DVD][*]   Diaper Money   Diaper Money [Video]   Dick In A Box   Do The Creep   Donkey Roll   Dramatic Intro   Dream Girl   Equal Rights   Falcor Vs Atreyu   Falcor Vs. Atreyu - Classy Skit #1   Falcor vsAtreyu   Finest Girl (Bin Laden Song)   Fuck Off   Go Kindergarden   Go Kindergarten   Hey Ya Ho   Hot New Single   Hugs   Hunter The Hungry Is Gon’ Eat   I Don t Give A Honk   I Don't Give A Honk   I F****D My Aunt   I Fucked My Aunt   I Just Had S..   I Just Had Sex   I Just Had Sex (Single)   I Just Had Sex [Edited Version]   I Just Had Sex [Explicit Version]   I Run NY   I Threw It On The Ground   I'm A Hustler   I'm A Hustler (Interlude)   I'm A Hustler (song?)   I'm a Weirdo   I'm On A Boat   I'm On A Boat (Clean Version)   I'm on a Boat [Clean]   I'm on a Boat [DVD]   I\u2019m So Humble   I'm On A Boat   I'm So Humble   I’m A Weirdo   I’m So Humble   Ibitha   Im On A Boat   Incredibad   Incredible Thoughts   Iran so far   J**z in My Pants   J**z in My Pants [DVD][*]   Jack Sparrow   Jack Sparrow (Single)   Japan   Jason Deeps   Jizz In My Pants   Jizz In My Pants   Just 2 Guyz   KaBlamo   Karate Guy   Kill This Music   Lazy Sunday   Lazy Sunday 2   Legalize It   Like A Boss   Mama   Maximus   Me Likey Dat   Meet The Crew   Mona Lisa   Mother Lover   Motherlover   Motherlover (Single)   Motherlover [Album Versions]   My Mic   My Mic - Interlude   My Mic (Interlude)   My Mic (Interlude)   No Homo   No Homo (Outro)   No Homo Outro   Normal Guy   Normal Guy (Interlude)   Old Saloon (Interlude)   Owen’s Song   Perfect Saturday   Perfect Sunday   Punch You In The Jeans   Ras Trent   Reba   Rock Roll Skate   Rocky   Santana DVX   Sax Man   Semicolon   Should I Move   Should I Move?   Shrooms   Shrooms (Interlude)   Shy Ronnie   Shy Ronnie 2   Shy Ronnie 2: Ronnie & Clyde   Shy Ronnie 2: Ronnie and Clyde   Shy Ronnie, Pt. 2: Ronnie & Clyde   Shy Ronnie, Pt. 2: Ronnie and Clyde   Sick Glenda   Space Olympics   Space Olympics [DVD][*]   Spell It Out   Spring Break Anthem   Spring Break Anthem (Single)   Spring Break Anthem [Video]   Stork Patrol   The Bing Bong Brothers   The Compliments   The Compliments (ft. Too $hort)   The Creep   The Creep (Single)   The Lonely Island HUGS featuring Pharrell & Tatian...   The Old Saloon   The Old Saloon (Interlude)   The Old Saloon (Interlude)   Things in My Jeep   Three Way   Three-Way (The Golden Rule)   Threw It On The Ground   Trip To Spain   Trouble On Dookie Island   Turn Up The Beef   Turtleneck & Chain   Turtleneck & Chain   Watch Me Do Me   Watch Me Do Me - Classy Skit #2   Watch Me Do Me (Classy Skit #2)   We Are A Crowd   We Like Sportz   We Like Sportz [DVD]   We Need Love   We'll Kill U   We're Back   We're Back!   We're Back! (Single)   We'll Kill U   What Was That Beat   When Will the Bass Drop   Where Brooklyn At?   Where Brooklyn At? (Interlude)   Who Said We're Wack   YOLO   YOLO [Video]   You ve Got The Look   You've Got The Look   ZanZabar

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