LyricMeaning

If I Were Prime Minister
Arrogant Worms

If I were prime minister I’d transform the land

All things would be glorious under my firm strong hand

I’d enlarge Prince Edward Island and shrink the tax on booze

If I were Prime Minister the Leafs would never lose


If I were Prime Minister French and English would be gone

There’d be no more two solitudes ‘cause we’d all speak Klingon

And I’d give my buddies jobs they weren’t qualified for

Wait, I’m so sorry, I think that’s been done before


If I were Prime Minister Canadians would tan

In the Gulf of Mexico where I’d move Newfoundland


If I were prime Minister I would use my power

To finally make the donut our official flower

And I’d make it illegal to sit and bitch and whine

Though that might leave Canadians with too much spare time


And I would be Prime Minister if only for one flaw

I don’t think that I could ever live in Ottawa


If I were, if I were, if I were Prime Minister

If I were, if I were, if I were Prime Minister

If I were, if I were, if I were Prime Minister

If I were, if I were, if I were Prime Minister


I’d bathe in Maple Syrup and I’d have a talking moose

And Mounties would massage me to keep me nice and loose

I’d get rid of the Queen and replace it with my cat

And appointment to the Senate would be trial by combat


I’d fix all the problems of our country’s apparatus

By granting ever person, nation status

I’d encourage global warming, move the jetstream further north

And I’d ban all politicians, except for me of course


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Lyrics by Arrogant Worms

  A Man Has Needs   A Manly Song   A Night On Dildo   A Real Letter From A Real Yahoo   Assumption Song   Baby Poo   Big Box Store   Big Fat Road Manager   Billy Themepark Shark   Billy, The Themepark Shark   Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah Blah   Bottle Of Booze   Boy Band   Canada Sucks   Canada's Really Big   Canada's Really Big   Car Full Of Pain   Car Of Pain   Carrot Juice Is Murder   Celine Dion   Cellphone Vigilante   Christmas Blues   Christmas Hangover   Christmas In Ignace   Christmas Is Almost Here   Christmas Sucks   Christmas Turkey Blues   Christmastime   Cows With Guns   Dad Threw Up On Christmas Day   Dangerous   Dog Food Woman   Dog Named Bob   Don't Go Into Politics   Don't Go Into Politics   Drink With Me   Forgive Us We're Canadian   Fuzzy Dice   Goin' Huntin'   Going Hunting   Great To Be A Nerd   Having Fun Is Bad For You   Head In The Freezer   Heimlich Maneuver   History is Made By Stupid People   Horizon   Hot Dog Song   I Am Cow   I Am Cow!!!!   I Am Not American   I Got Fingers   I pulled my groin   I Ran Away   I Want To Look Like Arnold   I'm The Only Gay Eskimo   Idiot Road   Jesus' Brother Bob   Jesus' Brother Bob   Johnny Came Home Headless   Kill The Dog Next Door   Killer Robots From Venus   Let There Be Guns   Let's Go Bowling   Let's Go Bowling   Life On The Road   Log In To You   Login To You   Lonely Lab Of Broken Hearts   Losing Hair Under God   Malcolm   Me Like Hockey   Me Like Hockey!   Mounted Animal Nature Trail   Mrs. Catto   My Neighbour's Learning Saxophone   My Voice Is Changing   New Car Smell   No Sale/no Store   No Sale\/No Store   Oh God, I'm Santa Claus   Oh God, I'm Santa Claus!   Oh God, I'm Santa Claus   Particle Board   Proud T O Be A Banker   Proud To Be A Banker   Proud To Be Canadian   Really Scary   Rippy The Gator   Rocks and Trees   Sam, The Guy From Quincy   Santa Got Arrested   Santa's Coming And He's Gonna Kick Your Ass   Santa's Gonna Kick Your Ass   Scary Ned   Sex, Drugs, and RRSP   Sex, Drugs, and RRSP's   She Talks During Movies   Shipwreck Balladeer   Song Inside My Head   Sponges   Stalker Girl   Steel Drivin' Man   Steel Drivin' Man   The Assumption Song   The Ballad Of Dan   The Beer Song   The Canada Song   The Canadian Crisis Song   The Christmas Song   The Coffee Song   The Credit Song   The Fishing Song   The Gaelic Song   The Golf Song   The Happy Happy Birthday Song   The Hockey Song   The Last Saskatchewan Pirate   The Last Sensitive Cowboy   The Me Song   The Monkey Song   The Mountie Song   The Same Christmas Cake   The Scotsman   The Toronto Song   The War of 1812   The Worst Seat On The Plane   Things Are Looking Bad For Santa   Tokyo Love Song   Toronto Sucks   Trichinosis   Trip To Greece   TV Weather Guy   Vincent The Christmas Virus   Waiting to Sell Out   Wayne Gretzky Rocks   We Are the Beaver   William Shakespeare's In My Cat   William Shakespeare's In My Cat   Winnebago   Wolfe Island Ferry   Wong's Chinese Buffet   Wong's Chinese Buffet

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