The Parable Of Glenn McGrath's Haircut
TISM

My mate Roger got a girl pregnant when he was fourteen. He was so shit
scared he told me, and when he said
that her dad was a cop I thought he was joking. I told him he's got to
tell someone, and so he went and told a teacher, and the girl eventually
got an abortion. He was fucking shitting himself, let me tell you, but
six months later he was fucking around like always.

Ooh, aahh, Glenn McGrath

You betta watch it I thought to myself. But Roger was pretty fucking
sure of himself. He was the guy who first brought a block of hash to a
party. Because I was his friend I was there when he first showed it to
people, and we all went down the backyard and he rolled a joint. Where
did he get it from? My parents would have killed me if they knew. I
thought we'd all turn into junkies or something if we had too much.

The last time I saw Roger was last year at the Boxing Day test. He'd
turned into such a fat, normal, yobbo cunt. The wife nearly didn't let
me out today he said, and he did all that chanting yobs do, like Ooh,
Aahh, Glenn McGrath. It got you in the end I thought to myself, as I
looked at Roger. Life got you in the end, pal. You were such a cocky,
successful winner when we were 16, but now you're just another sad fat
prick sitting in the M.C.G high-fiving in self-congratulation, as if its
you that had the skill and determination to play for Australia. Its
the cunts with the bad haircuts that you've got to watch out for.
There's never been a popular teenager yet who's done rat's with their
life. Its the fucking dorks that give it a real go. Glenn McGrath got
5 for 50 that day.


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Lyrics by TISM

  (He'll Never Be An) Ol' Man River   (I Think I’ve Got) Mick Jagger Worked Out   (There's Gonna Be) Sex Tonite   40 Years - Then Death   A Face Full Of Divertamenti   Abscess Makes The Heart Grow Fonder   All Homeboys Are Dickheads   All Ordinaries Index   Anarchy Means Crossing When It Says 'Don't Walk'   Aussiemandias   Babies Bite Back   Bash This Up Your Ginger   Been Caught Wankin'   BFW   Bishop = Handjob   Boot Party   Channel Turd   Choose Bad Smack   Come Back DJ, Your Record Is Scratched   Dazed And Confucious   Death Death Death   Death Death Death (Live at the Old Greek Theatre)   Defecate On My Face   Defecate On My Face (Country Version)   Defecate On My Face (MGF Remix)   Denial Works For Me   Dicktatorship   Doug Parkinson Sings Christie Allen   Dumb 'N' Base   Eckermann Is Very Silly   Everyone Else Has Had More Sex Than Me   Existentialtism   Ezra Pound, Axe-King   Father And Son   Five Yards   Fourteen Years In Rowville   Fuck ’Em Fuck ’Em - The Lot Of â€...   Garbage   Gas! Gas! - An Ecstasy Of Fumbling   Get Thee In My Behind, Satan   Get Thee To A Nunnery   Gimme Gimme Nervous Breakdown   Give Up For Australia   Great Expectorations   Greg! The Stop Sign!!   Honk If You Love Fred Durst   I Don't Want TISM, I Want A Girlfriend   I Drive A Truck   I Shit Me   I'll 'Ave Ya   I'm Interested In Apathy   I’m Gonna Sit Right Down And Whittle Away M...   I’m Into Led Zep   If You Ever Hear His Name, Harden Not Your Arterie...   If You're Creative, Get Stuffed   If You're Not Famous At Fourteen, You're Finished   If You’re Ugly, Forget It   Jack Elliot's Turf Whinge   Johnny To B. Or Not To B. Goode   Julius Seizure (Act III Scene II Verses 73-118)   Jung Talent Time   Kate - Fischer Of Men   Kevin Borich Expressionism Part 1   Kevin Borich Expressionism Part 2   Kevin Borich Expressionism Part 4   Kill Americans   Kill Yourself Now And Avoid The Rush   Ladies And Gentlemen - The Judeo-Christian Ethic   Leo’s Toltoy   Let's Form A Company   Let’s Club It To Death   Life Kills   Lillee Caught Dilley Bowled Milli Vanilli   Lose Your Delusion I   Lose Your Delusion II   Loser, Losing, Lost   Martin Scorsese Is Really Quite A Jovial Fellow   Michael Jackson’s Conveyor Belt   Mistah Eliot - He Wanker   Morrison Hostel   Mourningtown Ride   Mr. Ches Baragwanath, State Auditor-General   My Brilliant Huntington's Chorea   My Generation   Neighbours - Everybody Loves Good Neighbours   Never Mind The Bollocks, Here’s The House O...   Opposite Day   Play Mistral For Me   Professor Derrida Deconstructs   Pus   Pus Of The Dead   Rebel Without A Paunch   Recorded By JJJ, 24/1/93, Melbourne Showgrounds   Root   Saturday Night Palsy   Schoolies Week   Strictly Loungeroom   Take Your Love   Ten Points For A Razor Scooter   The Back Upon Which Jezza Jumped   The Ballad Of John Bonham's Coke Roadie   The Ballad Of The Semitic Nazi   The Fosters Car Park Boogie   The Last Australian Guitar Hero   The Men's Room   The Mordialloc Rd. Duplicator   The Mystery Of The Artist Explained   The Only Thing Stopping Me From Being Happy Is Tha...   The TISM Boat Hire Offer   The TISM Nightsoil Cart And Horse Blues   There’s More Men In Children Than Wisdom Kn...   Thou Shalt Not Britney Spear   Thunderbirds Are Coming Out   Volare   We Are The Champignons   Whatareya?   While My Catarrh Gently Weeps   Whinge Rock   Would The Last Person To Leave Please Turn Out The...   X-Treme Sports Can Kiss My Arse   Yob

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