She says not to buy her flowers
Or big expensive gifts
She says she don't want jewelry
And she doesn't need another dress
If I want to show her how much I adore her
The best way that I've found
Is to make sure when I'm finished
I put that toilet seat down
We've been to counciling
To try and see the ways we could improve
This thing between us
And different ways to show each other I love you
Forget about those getaway vacations
To romantic coastal towns
If you want to say I love you
Then put that toilet seat down
'Cause in the middle of the night
It's cold and it's dark
And when I hear my name in vain
I know I haven't done my part
She just wants me to support her
And the best way that I've found
So with a gentle hand and a loving touch
I put that toilet seat down
I know it's kind of funny
You can teach a little puppy
But it's very hard to train a grown man
When I'm all about my business
And the path of least resistance
She's the one that suffers in the end