Miss Lucy had some leeches nHer leeches liked to suck nAnd when they drank up all her blood nShe didn't give a nFunny when the doctors nHad locked her in her cell nMiss Lucy screamed all night that they nShould go to bloody nHello to the surgeon nWith scalpel old and blunt nHe'll tie you to the table nThen he'll mutilate your nCome it's nearly teatime nThe lunatics arrive nThe keepers bleed them all until nThere's no one left a nLively little rodents nAre eaten up by cats nWe're subject to experiments nLike laboratory nRats I've dropped a teacup nHow easily they break nI'm on my hands and knees until nI pay for my mis- nTake off all your clothing nWe've only just begun nWe have no anesthesia nIt's eighteen forty nOne thing we should tell you nBefore you try again nThe tests are all invented by nA lot of filthy nMentally hysteric nShe's failed the exam nDon't bother telling Lucy for nShe doesn't give a nDamn that nitrous oxidenFor when you can't escape nThey say the surgeons oft commit nA murder or a nRazor blades are rusty nAnd not a lot of fun nSo when they try to amputate nYour legs you'd better nRun and fetch the chemist nA patient's feeling sad nShe's been in chains for ages nAnd she isn't even nMadness is a nuisance nAnd no one is immune nYour sister, mum or daughter nMay become a raving nLunatics are dangerous nAnd doctors are obeyed nThey also go together just nLike toast and marma- nLadies are like children nWith brains the size of squirrels nLet's give a clitoridectomies nTo all the little nGirls are helpless treasures nThat daddies must protect nSo lie upon the table nFor the doctors to in- nSpeculums are super nAnd stirrups all the rage nSo spread a lady's legs and put her back into her nCage of naked crazies nThe surgeon's here to bleed nThe doctors are all learned men nAnd some can even nReading can be risky nFor women on the verge nIt only did us worlds of good nTo poison, leech and nPurging is a penance nPhlebotomys a chore nNo need to sterilize the tools nWe never did be- nFore the night is over nBefore you go to bed nThey'll take a hammer and a nail nAnd jam it in your nHeadstones in the courtyard nAnd statues in the park nAre not for the insane nJust leave them rotting in the nD-A-R-K nDark nDarknDarknDarknDark