I Dream Of Jesus
Dead Milkmen

It was during my 2nd senior year when Mom found Jesus Christ. His
Spirit was trapped inside an old Nana Shepard's bottle that Mom picked
Out of the dumpster behind the 7-11. Mom brought the bottle inside and
Sat it down on top of the tv. Then she told all of us kids to gather
Round, and then she explained how Jesus lived in the bottle, and how,
If she wanted to, she could call him out to do her bidding. Sis said it
Reminded her of an old tv show, and Mom slapped her and called her a
Heretic. I didn't say anything, cause I just still remember the time
Outside the Safeway, when it took 4 security guards to hold Mom down.

Jesus loves me, yes I know
For the Bible tells me so
When I'm weak he makes me strong
That's why I sing this song
If I die before I wake
Pray to him my soul don't take
Jesus loves me, yes I know

It wasn't long before people from all over the world started coming to
Our house to see the bottle. At first I thought that this would make me
More popular at school. Instead it seemed to have the opposite result.
Kids would stop and point at me in the hallway and say, There's the boy
Whose mother keeps our savior cooped up in that tiny little bottle. And
Then everybody started calling me 'Bottle boy'. And that really hurt. It
Was also around this time that Mom began to attract some really weird
Followers. Like that guy who never used deodorant and spoke only in
Riddles. And that woman who collected 19th century hand made Amish
Swimwear.

Jesus loves me, yes I know
For the Bible tells me so
When I'm weak he makes me strong
That's why I sing this song
If I die before I wake
Pray to him my soul don't take
Jesus loves me, yes I know

Mommy she loved Jesus, but not like others did
For she had a special bottle in which our savior lived
Mommy she loved Jesus, but not like others did
For she could unleash His vengeance by unfastening the lid

As the year went on, things went from bad to worse, and I realized that
If there wasn't a big change pretty soon, I'd never be able to get a
Date for the prom. I couldn't go the year before because Mom belonged
To a church that considered dancing a one way ticket to Hell. But
That's a whole nother story. Anyway, by this point Mom had appeared on
The Richard Bey Show, A. M. Philadelphia and Geraldo, so there was
No use in me changing schools, since everybody knew who my Mom was.
Also we had to spend all the money from Mom's personal appearances to
Hire a bodyguard, since by this point we were getting about 400 death
Threats a day.

Jesus loves me, yes I know
For the Bible tells me so
When I'm weak he makes me strong
That's why I sing this song
If I die before I wake
Pray to him my soul don't take
Jesus loves me, yes I know

Then one night, I just couldn't stand it any more. While everyone else
Was sleeping I crept downstairs. Slowly I went up to the bottle and
Began to unfasten the lid. At first, nothing happened. But then the room
Filled with a thick white smoke. I was glad my sister had taken the
Batteries out of the smoke detector to put into her Walkman. When the
Smoke cleared, I found myself face to face with the son of God, who was
Much shorter than I had expected. He told me that since I'd freed Him,
He'd grant me one wish. And that's how I got to go to the prom with
Geena Davis. But you probably already read about that in People.

Jesus loves me, yes I know
For the Bible tells me so
When I'm weak he makes me strong
That's why I sing this song
If I die before I wake
Pray to him my soul don't take
Jesus loves me, yes I know

Mommy she loved Jesus, but not like others did
For she had a special bottle in which our savior lived
Mommy she loved Jesus, but not like others did
For she could unleash His vengeance by unfastening the lid
Mommy she loved Jesus, but not like others did
For she had a special bottle in which our savior lived
Mommy she loved Jesus, but not like others did
For she could unleash His vengeance by unfastening the lid


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Lyrics by Dead Milkmen

  (Theme From) Blood Orgy Of The Atomic Fern   Air Crash Museum   All Around the World   Anderson, Walkman, Buttholes And How!   Anthropology Days   Ask Me To Dance   At the Moment   Bad Party   Beach Party Vietnam   Beach Song   Beige Sunshine   Belafonte's Inferno   Big Deal   Big Lizard   Big Scary Place   Big Time Operator   Big Words Make The Baby Jesus Cry   Bitchin' Camaro   Bitchin' Camaro (The Best Thanksgiving Ever)   Bleach Boys   Born to Love Volcanos   Brat in the Frat   Chaos Theory   City Of Mud   Cousin Earl   Crystalline   Dance With Me   Dark Clouds Gather Over Middlemarch   Dean's Dream   Death's Alright With Me   Depression Day Dinner   Do The Brown Nose   Dollar Signs In Her Eyes   Don't Abort that Baby   Don't Deny Your Inner Child   Earwig   Epic Tales Of Adventure   Everybody's Got Nice Stuff But Me   Fifty Things   Filet Of Sole   Girl Hunt   God's Kid Brother   Going To Graceland   Gorilla Girl   Happy Is   Helicopter Interiors   Here Comes Mr. X   How It's Gonna Be   Howard Beware   I Against Osbourne   I Am The Walrus   I Can't Stay Awake   I Don't Wanna   I Hate Myself   I Hate You, I Love You   I Hear Your Name   I Started To Hate You   I Tripped Over The Ottoman   I Walk the Thinnest Line   I'm Flying Away   I've Got To Get My Numbers Up   If I Had a Gun   If You Love Somebody, Set Them On Fire   In Praise Of Sha Na Na   Instant Club Hit (You'll Dance To Anything)   Jason's Head   Jellyfish Heaven   Junkie   Khrissy   Labor Day   Land Of The Shakers   Laundromat Song   Leggo My Ego   Let's Get The Baby High   Like To Be Alone   Little Man In My Head   Little Volcano   Lucky   Methodist Coloring Book   Milkmen Stomp   Moron   My Many Smells   Nitro Burning Funny Cars   Nobody Falls Like   Not Crazy   Now Everybody's Me   Now I Wanna Hold Your Dog   Nutrition   Part 3   Peter Bazooka   Plum Dumb   Pretty Music For Pretty People   Punk Rock Girl   Rastabilly   RC's Mom   Right Wing Pigeons   Ringo Buys a Rifle   Rock 'n' Roll Queen (Originally By Mott The Hoople...   Rocketship   Ronald Reagan Killed The Black Dahlia   Sarah Jean   Serrated Edge   Shaft in Greenland   Shapes Of Things (originally by The Yardbirds)   Silly Dreams   Six Days   Somewhere Over Antarctica   Song For Michael's Pipe   South Bound Saurez (originally by Led Zeppelin)   South Bound Suarez   Spit Sink   Sri Lanka Sex Hotel   Streetlamps - Walking To Work   Stuart   Stupid Mary Anne   Surfin' Cow   Swampland Of Desire   Swordfish   Swordfish (Inc. Instant Club Hit Medley Thing)   Tacoland   Take Me Apart   Take Me To The Specialist   Takin' Retards To The Zoo   The Badger Song   The Big Sleazy   The Blues Song   The Conspiracy Song   The Fez   The Fez (Live version)   The Girl With The Strong Arm   The Great Boston Molasses Flood   The Guitar Song   The Infant Of Prague Customized My Van   The Man Who Rides The Bus   The Pit   The Puking Song   The Secret of Life   The Sun Turns Our Patio Into A Lifeless Hell   The Thing That Only Eats Hippies   The Woman Who Was Also A Mongoose   Tiny Town   Train I Ride   Two Feet Off The Ground   V.F.W.   Vince Lombardi Service Center   Violent School   Watching Scotty Die   Welcome To Undertown   When I Get To Heaven   Where The Tarantula Lives   Wonderfully Colored Plastic War Toys

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