Shearer, Van Nistelroy, Gascoigne, Gabiadini
Jaaskelainen's off his line
Lobbed by Thierry Henri
Zamora, Cureton, Jermaine McSporran
Bergkamp to Kevin Lunt
Who dummies it for Lauren
The ref's a cheat, he's yards offside
This is football English style
Bellamy's out drinking, with the Leeds United team
Wimbledon's in uproar, from Selhurst Park to Milton Keynes
I disagree with every word ever said by Alan Green
The man in the front row shouts something obscene
Sit down, abuse your team
The crowd goes wild
This is football English style
We prefer the Nationwide
Book your seats in advance
Put them on the credit card
The chairman's in Ray Parlour
Counting up the overdraft
Ron Noades, and Ken Bates, chairmen that we love to hate
ITV, Sky Digital, pay per view's not feasible
Wages sky-high
We prefer the Nationwide
(This is football English style)
FA Cup third round
Played on a muddy ground
Everyone gets stuck-in
From Wayne Carlisle to Yeovil Town
The Premiership fancy dans
Brought to earth at Layer Road
The studs go in, tackles fly
The crowd invades, players dive
Man United want a bye
This is football English style
Owen and Beckham
League of English Gentlemen
Hamstrings and cruciates
Fancy terms for pulls and breaks
World Cup, Champions League
The LDV Vans Trophy
No roads lead to Wembley
Play off dramas, Go bananas
Hot dogs. Doggy pies
This is football English style
We prefer the Nationwide
Shearer, van Nistelroy
Gascoigne, Gabbiadini
Jaaskelainen's off his
Lobbed by Thierry Henri
Zamora, Cureton, Jermaine McSporran
Collect your own football stars
But don't forget Lua Lua