this is to the woman who I loved but lost.nintertwined souls of the universe got divorced.nbut it wasn't forced. got single thoughts of being double crossed,nstill there's no love lost.nnnow i can't even start this. i see no light inside the darkness.nso whatcha want, miss? don't check my pulse because i'm heartless.nyou were my life support. and in a sense my defense fights the thought.ni'll try to keep this one nice and short.nour four chambers beat in unison.nI'm wanting you to listen to the dead silence in my defiance.ni used to sin and be intrigued by violence,nnow as i glimpse into the past i thank God for your guidance.nalas, i give my eyes a rinse.nblink and think in retrospect...realize you need to get your respect.ni apologize as i holler criesn'cause it's you and not these college guys that keeps my knowledge wise.nyou're my crutch. but now i fall cause you're someone i can't touch.nnow no one wants to help me up and that's too much.neven my wisdom fell. i'm in a living hell.nthrow my inner child back in the prison cell.nincarcerated hatred is causing conflictnwith the free love sentencing death to the convict.nmy soul is on skid row, where can this kid go?ni'm homeless, how could you notice when this whole world didn't know?nit's time i make public just how personal we got in private moments,nbecause lies are our opponents.nforget material or superficial stuff.ni either let you know too much or not enough.nnthis is to the woman who i loved but lost.nintertwined souls of the universe got divorced.nbut it wasn't forced. got single thoughtsnof being double crossed, still there's no love lost. There's no love lost.nnI can't pretend this. The impact on my life has been tremendous.nIt can't be fixed with a friendly kissnWhat's endless?nQuestions, pain, grief and misbelief?nI'm so faithful all I grind is my teeth.nBut what I find beneath the surface has changed from priceless to worthless.nThis three ring circus of clowning around is what hurts us.nMy brain short circuits as my mind starts to wandernto discover another lover. I'm isolated, living somber.nShe's whispering come hither from there yonder.nI don't think i wanna. The pressure ain't gettin' lesser.nOpen my dresser...it overflows with memorabilia.nMomentos of our success now symbolize my failure.nI took time to write you diaries when we couldn't speak much.nAccording to you that was a weak touch.nCause actions speak louder than words. Turn up your hearing aid.nYou made this man afraid. Put the pin back in the hand grenade.nThere's not much time left til I'm left with nothing but a broken promise.nWhile every syllable I said was spoken honest.nWe expected each other to be a physic mind reader.nDon't tell me life goes on. I need her...nNext to me...nSo once again I can feel the high of ecstasy...nWe tripped...walking down the aisle of destiny.nRespectful sexually, because see...I understood.nAnd I don't know too many people who wouldnhave done anything to get a laugh from their better half.nI should have sensed it sooner...when you lost your sense of humor.nNow let my soul speak, I couldn't eat for a whole week.nWith no sleep. The price I pay for being a control freak.nNow I'm screaming inside my pillow instead of dreaming.nI must have said I love you so much that it lost it's meaning.nBut no one's perfect, so where's my chance to make adjustments?nIt's worth it...if our romance had substance.nBecause with purity we conceived marriage.nTil insecurity caused a miscarriagennnthis is to the woman who i loved but lost.nintertwined souls of the universe got divorced.nbut it wasn't forced. got single thoughts of being double crossed...nnI was in it for the long runnNow who's the weak and the strong one?nI tried to be Mr. Right, though things were wrongly done.nbut ummmm...When it was time for sacrificenStraight up, you didn't have to ask me twice.nI put off this rap device.nI wasn't ACTING nice, all my feelings they were genuine.nYou got me open and I let you in.nBut now you're screaming bloody murder. Used the entrance as the exit.nNow you're abscent like my mind, i'm on a head trip.nYou never said shit. Used then misused the entrancenAnd never let me get in one sentence.nForget friends...you were my best onenNow I'm depressed, son. It didn't take long for the stress to come.nMemories be my arch nemesisnAs i sit and reminisce, wondering if you remember this:nOur genesis. First experiences on old dates.nGot cold shakes and tingles, never single, we were soulmates.nThat term used to hold weight but now it's temporarynAnd lately I've been making trips to the cemetery.nAin't nothing evil in death, but this feels devilish.nI'd never wish this on my worst enemy.nRemember me.