How Mark Got His Sanity Back
Adam Selzer

Mark Henry was a dishwashing man, Lord Lord
Mark Henry was a dishwashing man
All night long he'd scrub 'em clean
In a restaurant too cheap to buy a machine
Instead there were three silver sinks in a row
First he'd scrub in sink one then the dishes would go
Into sink number 2, a rinse based fixture
Then into the sanitizer, a bleach water mixture

Tub one, tub two, tub three, tub one tub two tub three
All night long with a break at 10:15
Over and over, night and day
Mark knew that his sanity was getting away
First it was creeping like a betrayed best pal
Then it ran about like Archie Bunker's old La Salle
He knew this was bad, but what could he do?
He looked at tub one, then he looked at tub two
Then he looked at tub 3 and something snapped in his brain
So Mark decided to stick his head in the sanitizer to get himself sane

He was down there 45, 50 seconds, a minute or more
Til a cook walked in and nearly fell on the floor
When he saw Mark drowning in that pool of sanity he was heard to shout
Hey! Mark's drowning in a pool of sanity - ask Jane if we should let him out!
Jane drew heavily on her last cigarette,
Exhaled, rolled her eyes, and said yeah, go ahead and get
Him out, and call a doctor to make sure he's all right...
Aw, crap, who's gonna finish the dishes tonight?
So the ambulance came and it took Mark away
And the doctors said, physically, Mark was okay
But they recommended therapy to work on his brain
And Mark came out of therapy
A...perfectly sane.

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