I'm not even gay so a lot's unclearnbut the way he smiles before you disappearnand pats the heads of the Bush youthnand sends 'em off to spyntells 'em hide under Mommy's bednand to write down all those words she saidnand bring them back and some goodies you'll havenso is there any need to ask why?nnchorus:nI'm in love with John AshcroftnI fought it long but I still lostnto see him in front of Congress well..nI've found what I once lostnI'm in love with John AshcroftnnDon't have the nerve to tell the wifenbut she's a patriot and can take the strifenfor the good of her countrynshe'll agree to share her manna lust for power it turns me onnbut his head and my heart are already gonenI don't like 'em complicatednso I'm getting while I cannnchorusnnHe's gonna make this country safe you seenbut if I share his bed he won't arrest menthat is unless I'm really badnand mention the 'C' wordnthat's the constitition boys and girlsnbut if you've got yourself big enough pearlsnit's just like toilet papernmaybe you have heard...nnChorus