Growth Spurt
Chris Knox

She had a hard-onnShe had a muscle out of placenIt looked peculiarnOccupying unlikely spacenShe saw a doctor and he cut her widenWhen he saw inside he nearly diednnShe had a sisternShe had a sibling in her groinnA small relationnWith whom she didn't know she'd joinednThis was a problem 'cause she'd always beennThe Queen of hearts -- a spoiled only childnnShe called her ShirleynShe dressed her in the finest clothesnBut she was racked with painn'Cause Shirley had a cuter nosenShe saw a doctor and he cut the lumpnAnd smooth the humpnTo make her look much better from the sidennBut things are never quite that simplenThey change and stay the same and fade awaynnHer husband left hernHe didn't like her nose at allnAnd she blamed ShirleynSmashed her tiny head against the wallnThe judge and jury watched her as she criednThrew her inside and tossed away the keynn15 years laternThey let her out for being goodnShe made a fortunenCarving little figures out of woodnThey were all Shirley but they were still and coldnShe made and sold them till the day she died

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