I'm not scared, but this is happeningnI'm not afraid, but this is realnIt all comes at oncenFrom every single directionnnThis time I'm not sleeping at allnHow could this be realnI've failed younI was lying when I saidnnI was looking northnI was too scared to show what I amnBear with me this is all I have leftnThis night be more than a simple conversationnnIt's been dancing around in my headnFor quite some timenJust the thoughnOf cleaning up myselfnnI stare at the wallnWatching my time float awaynIt's all been a blurnAnd nothing will changenI was lyingnThis is defeat