The Edison Museum, not open to the publicIts haunted towers rise into the clouds above itFolks drive in from out of town to gaze in amazement when they see itJust outside the gate, I look into the courtyardUnderneath the gathering thunderstormThrough the iron bars, I see the Black MariahRevolving slowly on its platformIn the topmost tower, a light burns dimA coiling filament glowing withinThe Edison Museum, once a bustling factory,Today's but a darkened cobweb-covered hive of industryThe tallest, widest, and most famousHaunted mansion in New JerseyBehind a wooden door, the voice of Thomas AlvaRecites a poem on a phonographGhosts float up the stairLike silent moving picturesThe loyal phantoms of his in-house staffA wondrous place it is, there can be no doubtBut no one ever goes inAnd no one ever goes outSo when your children quarrel, and nothing seems to quell themJust tell them that you'll take them to the Edison MuseumThe largest independently owned and operatedMausoleum
Lyrics by They Might Be Giants
(She Was A) Hotel Detective [untitled] 0Can You Find It? 200 SBemails 25 O'clock 32 Footsteps 85 Radio Special Thank You. 9 Secret Steps A Self Called Nowhere A Shooting Star Is Not A Star Aaa About Me Absolutely Bill's Mood Absolutely Bill's Mood AKA Driver Alienation's for the Rich Alienation's For The Rich All The Lazy Boyfriends Alphabet Lost And Found Alphabet Of Nations Am I Awake? Ana Ng Another First Kiss Answer Ant Apartment Four Au Contraire Bangs Bastard Wants To Hit Me Bastard Wants to Hit Me [*] Battle For The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) Become A Robot Bed Bed Bed Bee Of The Bird Of The Moth Beneath The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) Birdhouse in Your Soul Birds Fly Black Ops Boat of Car Boss Of Me Boss Of Me("Malcolm In Middle" Bread Hair Broke In Two C Is For Conifers Cabbagetown Cage & Aquarium Cage & Aquarium Call You Mom Can You Find It? Can You Find It? [DVD] Can't Keep Johnny Down Careful What You Pack Cells Certain People I Could Name Chess Piece Face Christmas Cards Circular Karate Chop Clap Your Hands Clap Your Hands [*] Clap Your Hands [DVD][*] Climbing The Walls Clowntown Concrete And Clay Confusing The Mind Conquest Of The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) Contrecoup Counterfeit Fake Courage the Cowardly Dog Theme Cowtown Critic Intro Cyclops Rock D & W D & W [DVD] D & W D And W D Is For Drums D Is for Drums [DVD] D Is for Drums! Damn Good Times Damn Good Times [*] Dark And Metric Dead Destination Moon Dig My Grave Dinner Bell Dirt Bike Doctor Worm Don't Let's Start Don't Let's Start (single mix) Don't Let's Start Dont Know Why It Takes That Long Doris Cunningham Dr. Evil Dr. Worm Drink! Drinking E Eats Everything E Eats Everything [DVD] E Eats Everything [Elegant Too Remix] Edison Museum Edison Museum [Wax Cylinder Recording] Eight Hundred & Thirteen Mile Car Trip End Of The Rope Erase Escape From The Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) Even Numbers Everything Right is Wrong Again Experimental Film Experimental Film [*] Experimental Film [DVD][*] Exquisite Dead Guy Extra Savoir-Faire Fake Out in Buenos Aires Fake-Believe Fake-Believe (Type B) Fake-Believe (Type B) [DVD] Fake-Believe [DVD] Feign Amnesia Fibber Island Figure Eight Fingertips Fingertips (Reprise) Finished With Lies First Kiss Flying V Flying V [DVD] For Science Four of Two Go For G! Go for G! [DVD] Good To Be Alive Goodnight Goodnight My Friends Goodnight My Friends [DVD] Greek #3 Hall of Heads Hate The Villanelle Hearing Aid Hell Hotel Here Come The ABCs Here Come the Abcs [DVD] Here Come the ABCs! Here In Higglytown Hey, Mr. DJ, I Thought You Said We Had a Deal Hi Honey I'm Home Hi Honey I'm Home Hide Away Folk Family Hive Mind Hiya Homunculus Hopeless Bleak Despair Hot Cha Hot Dog! Hotel Detective Hovering Sombrero How Can I Sing Like A Girl? How Much Cake Can You Eat Hypnotist of Ladies I Am a Grocery Bag I Am A Human Head I Am Not Your Broom I C U I C U [DVD] I Can Add I Can Hear You I Can Help The Next In Line I Can't Hide I Can't Hide From My Mind I Find It Hard To Believe I Hope That I Get Old Before I Die I Need Some Lovin' I Palindrome I I Should Be Allowed To Think I'll Sink Manhattan I'm Def I'm Impressed I've Got A Fang I've Got a Match I've Got A World That Swings I'll Sink Manhattan I'm A Coward I'm Def I'm Impressed I'm Sick (Of This American Life) I've Got A Fang I've Got A Match If I Wasn't Shy If I Wasn't Shy In the Middle In The Middle, In The Middle, In the Middle Introducing C Is for Conifers Introducing C Is for Conifers [DVD] Introducing Z Y X Introducing Z y X [DVD] Istanbul Istanbul (Not Constantinople) It's Kickin' In It's Not My Birthday It's Kickin' In It's Not My Birthday James K. Polk John Lee Supertaster Kiss Me, Son of God Kiss Me, Son of God (alternate version) Kitten Intro L M N O L M N O [DVD] Lady is a Tramp Lazy Head and Sleepy Bones Lazyhead And Sleepybones Let Me Tell You About My Operation Letter / Not a Letter Letter Shapes Letter/Not a Letter Letter/Not a Letter [DVD] Letterbox Lie Still, Little Bottle LMNO Lost My Mind Lucky Ball & Chain Lucky Ball & Chain Lullaby To Nightmares Madam, I Challenge You To A Duel Maine Mainstream Malcolm in the Middle(Theme Song) Mammal Man, It's So Loud In Here Man, It's So Loud In Here Marty Beller Mask Maybe I Know Meet James Ensor Memo To Human Resources Metal Detector Mickey Mouse Clubhouse Theme Mink Car Monsters Of Mud Mr. Klaw Mr. Me Mr. Xcitement Mrs. Cinderella Mrs. Train Museum of Idiots Music Jail, Pt. 1 & 2 Music Jail, Pt. 1 & 2 My Brother the Ape My Evil Twin My Man Nanobots Narrow Your Eyes New York City Next Plane To London Nightgown of the Sullen Moon No One Knows My Plan No! Nonagon Nothing's Gonna Change My Clothes Nothing's Gonna Change My Clothes Nouns Now That I Have Everything Number Three O, Do Not Forsake Me Older On Earth My Nina On The Drag Ondine One Dozen Monkeys Ooh La! Ooh La! Operators Are Standing By Out Of Jail Particle Man Pencil Rain Pet Name Photosynthesis Pictures Of Panda's Painting Pictures of Pandas Painting Pictures of Pandas Painting [DVD] Piece of Dirt Pirate Girls Nine Planet Of The Apes Planet Of The Apes (Hidden) Prevenge Purple Toupee Put Your Hand Inside The Puppet Head Q U Q U [DVD] QU Rabid Child Read A Book Reprehensible Return From The Planet Of The Apes (hidden) Rhythm Section Want Ad Richards on Richards Road Movie to Berlin Robot Parade Robot Parade [DVD][*] Rolling O Rolling O [DVD] Roy G. Biv S - E - X - X - Y S-E-X-X-Y Santa's Beard Sapphire Bullets of Pure Love Schoolchildren Singing \"Particle Man\" See The Constellation Sentimental Over you Seven Seven Days Of The Week (I Never Go To Work) She Thinks She's Edith Head She's Actual Size She's an Angel Shoehorn with Teeth Sleeping in the Flowers Sleepwalkers Snail Shell Snowball In Hell Someone Keeps Moving My Chair Speed and Velocity Spider Spider-man Theme Song Spine Spines Spiraling Shape Spy Stalk Of Wheat Stalk of Wheat [DVD][*] Stand on Your Own Head Stomp Box Stuff Is Way Subliminal Swing Is A Word Take Out The Trash Ten Mississippi The Bells Are Ringing The Big Big Whoredom The Biggest One The Bloodmobile The Cap'm The Cap'm The Darlings Of Lumberland The Day The End of the Tour The Famous Polka The Guitar (The Lion Sleeps Tonight) The House At The Top Of The Tree The Incredible Shrinking Day The Mesopotamians The Shadow Government The Statue Got Me High The Vowel Family The Vowel Family [DVD] The World Before Later On The World's Address The World's Address (Joshua Fried re-mix) Theme From Flood There's A Great Big Beautiful Tomorrow Thermostat They Got Lost They Might Be Giants They'll Need a Crane This Ape's For You (Hidden) Through Being Cool Thunderbird Till My Head Falls Off Toddler Hiway Turn Around Twisting Underwater Woman Unpronounceable Unrelated Thing Upside Down Frown Violin Violin [DVD][*] Wake Up Call We Want a Rock We're the Replacements Wearing A Raincoat Weep Day When It Rains It Snows Where Do They Make Balloons Where Your Eyes Don't Go Which Describes How You're Feeling Whistling in the Dark Who Put The Alphabet In Alphabetical Order? Who Put the Alphabet in Alphabetical Order? [DVD] Why Does the Sun Shine Why Does the Sun Shine? Why Does the Sun Shine? (The Sun Is a Mass of Inca... Why Must I Be Sad? Wicked Little Critta Window With The Dark Withered Hope Women & Men Women & Men Working Undercover For The Man XTC vs. Adam Ant Yeh Yeh You'll Miss Me Your Own Worst Enemy Your Racist Friend Youth Culture Killed My Dog Z Y X Z y X [DVD] ZYX
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