The Chanukah Song III
Adam Sandler

Put on your yamulkenIt's time for Chanukah (sounds good guys)nOnce again it's OnakahnThe miracle of Chanukah. (give it up for the Drei Dels everybody!)nnChanukah is the festival of lights.nOne day of presents?nHell no, We get eight crazy nights.nnBut if you still feel like the only kid in town without a Christmas treenI guess my first two songs didn't do it for younSo here comes number three!nnRoss and Phoebe from Friends say the Chanukah blessing.nSo does Lenny's pal Squiggy and Will & Grace's Debra Messing.nnMelissa Gilbert and Michael Landon never mixed meat with dairy.nMaybe they should have called that show Little Kosher House on the Prairie.nnWe got Jerry Lewis, Ben Stiller and Jack Black.nTom Arnold converted to Judaism, but you guys can have him back!n(Just kidding Tommy!)nnWe may not get to kiss underneath the mistletoenBut we can do it all night long with Deuce Bigalow! (I'm jewish!)nOh My God! Sweet Robbie Schneider is here!nnPut on the yamukahnHere comes ChanukahnThe guy in Willie Nelson's band who plays harmonicanCelebrates Chanukah.nOooo, good job SchneidernnOsama bin Laden--(Booo!)--not a big fan of the Jews.nWell, maybe that's because he lost a figure skating match to gold medalistnSarah Hughes, her mama's Jewish!nnHoudini and David Blaine escaped straightjackets with such precision.nBut the one thing they could not get out ofnTheir painful circumcision.nnAs for half-Jewish actors, Sean Penn is quite the great one,nAnd Marlon Brando not a Jew at all ,nBut it looks to me like he ate one.nnThere's Lou Reed, Perry Ferrell, Beck and Paula Abdul.nJoey Ramone invented punk rock musicnBut first came Hebrew school.nnNatalie PortmanukahnIt's time to celebrate Chanukah.nI hope I get an Abrtronicah,non this joyful, toyful Chanukah.nnSo get a high colonicahnAnd soil your long johnukahsnIf you really really wannakah.nHave a happy, happy, happy, happy, happy, happynHappy Chan-u-kah!nn(Buckle up for safety everybody! Good night!!)

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