Been playing Shaftsbury AvenuenFor a thousand years or maybe two - darlingsnDone plenty bum gigs in my timenBut everything's alright nownIn the mousetrapnIn the mousetrapnnWe fall in love most every nightnWe're quite ridiculously tight - darlingsnAnd yeah I feel some kind of freaknGetting killed six times a weeknIn the mousetrapnIn the mousetrapnnIt's nearly half past threenGotta do a matineenI don't understand this gamenWhy everything's the samenBut as the show go on and onnAnd on and onnAnd on and on and on and on and onnAnd onnnI know the punters mustn't seenHow mundane it seems to me - darlingsnBut sometimes I wish I could screwnSomeone else in Shaftsbury AvenuenIn the mousetrapnIn the mousetrapnnCurtain up - expositionnDevelopment of characternPlot - unravelling slownSustaining interest, gathering momentumnTill they unmask the killernThen a twist right at the endnAnd it's all over till tomorrow nightnIn the mousetrapnIn the mousetrapnIn the mousetrapnIn the mousetrapnIn the mousetrapnIn the mousetrapnIn the mousetrapnIn the mousetrapnIn the mousetrapnIn the mousetrap