In 1986, In the University of California, Davis, Sought 2 of the all-time brightest stars,
Dr. Alphonze Mephisto, and Dr. Arty Abe Sacrabin,
Dr. Mephisto worked hard toward his thesis,
His goal was to genetically locate the DNA structure of an asparagus,
So that all Asparagus's would grow to the same growth and length,
Giving the asparagus a much more closer presentation of the worlds supermarket
vegetable business, Dr. Abe Sacrabin's goal was to genetically create the greatest
musical entertainer the world had ever seen,
Dr. Abe Sacrabin knew that he would symbol the bright elements in a theory that would
rebuild the DNA Structure, but make sure his creation had talent far surpassed the
average individual,
At the time, one subject of urban myth was the story that Michael Jackson in a plan to
retain his youthful looking feminine vocal characteristics to have his testicles
surgically removed, Thereby making him a modern day Jastrato,
If such of this were true,
Michael Jackson would more than likely have some of his Semen preserved in from the
surgery to insure the future of his name and heritage,
Word came back to Dr. Abe Sacrabin,
Of a secret cold storage locker,
Deep within the boughs of a used UCLA research center,
That not only contained four containers of frozen Semen,
but also held a pair of Testicles that were each labeled, Jack Michaelson,
What's that noise, In the not-so most insisulal voice,
The song of love from an ageless boy, stuck in my head,
And this is what he said,
I am gopher boy, I'm the ring reality,
I am gopher Boy, Who will buy my raspberries,
This had to be the seed of the king of pop,
Dr. Abe Sacrabin was able to use his charm and chisel pre feature to woo-woo a young lab
technician by the name Jennifer,
Who of course just happened to have the proper access key to obtain a small part of the precious semen,
the search for the egg was a short one,
Dr. Mephisto simply ran an ad across the classified section of an LA Music magazine.
The ad read: Wanted: Unfertilized human egg fortunate for an experiment. Donors must have musical background.
With a pluther of young ego wannabe beautiful stardomness, used to sell their eggs.
The 2 doctor's after ridorous auditioning picked, and then purchased.
Dr. Abe Sacrabin felt better when before it all was complicated legaly,
And the human fetus was brought to term of this world as not human,
He had launched and secured the services of the University Volleyball Miss Stops,
A Llama by the name of Missy,
When the baby was ready,
the child was reeled by a suzerain,
It was a healthy baby boy, he was named Kevin,
What's that noise, In the not-so most insisulal voice,
The song of love from an ageless boy, stuck in my head,
And this is what he said,
I am gopher boy, I'm the ring reality,
I am gopher Boy, Who will buy my Raspberries,
Kevin was a beautiful child,
Dr. Abe Sacrabin sought to make that Kevin was trained by the best in all aspects of performing,
His voice was golden and had a sweetness to it that most males lacked,
He was ruled with grace and was able to moon walk by the time he was 3,
As Kevin grew talent, Dr. Abe Sacrabin started noticing odd developments in his
physical state, When Kevin lost his baby teeth, The secondary came in with vengeance,
They were at least twice the size as a normal adult's and 2 in front stuck nearly straight out,
Also When Kevin reached the 8th year, he was the same height as he was when he was 4,
To top it off, he was growing hair all over and his penis was enormous,
Even by adult standards ,
It also dawned on the Dr. That even through all the years of hearing Kevin's singing, he
barely spoke, often to communicate through his grunts and gurtles
What's that noise, In the not-so most insisulal voice,
The song of love from an ageless boy, stuck in my head,
And this is what he said,
I am gopher boy, I'm the ring reality,
I am gopher Boy, Who will buy my Raspberries,
Other's were noticing the changes in Kevin,
the children would begin to tease him, and call him Gopher-Boy,
One Day, a bully by the name of Big Roy, started throwing banana's at him,
And soon a crowd of kids were all throwing banana's,
Suddenly, in a fury, Kevin rushed on big Roy and bit 3 fingers off of his left hand,
Kevin was taken away and placed in the custody of the state,
Dr. Abe Sacrabin actions were found out,
But because there was no legislation concerning the genetic instructions of another human being,
No Criminal charges were brought forth,
The medical situations board of epics stripped him of all his prudential and his
reputation was ruined,
In fact, his name became so sonomonous of failure,
That for years to come, Men breeding around the world were known to say in time of
mishaps, Damn, I feel just like Abe Sacrabin.
Dr. Mephisto immediately began proceeding to adopt little Kevin,
Being the only scientist and the creator of the clonus various,
It wasn't long before the 2 were equally reunited as father and son,
They moved to Colorado, where they work on many experiments,
Kevin is still a boy, of few spoken words, Still he talks in grunts and gurtles, but on occasion,
if you listen closely, you can hear is sweet golden singing voice, running out into the night, over the town, of South Park.
I am gopher boy, I'm the ring reality,
I am gopher boy, but who will buy my raspberries
Mephisto And Kevin
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