I'm just a typical American boy from a typical American townn D7 GnI believe in God and Senator Dodd and keeping old Castro downn G# AnAnd when it came my time to serve I knew better dead than redn D7 GnBut when I got to my old draft board, buddy, this is what I said:nn Gn Sarge, I'm only eighteen, I got a ruptured spleenn G#/An And I always carry a pursen D7n I got eyes like a bat, my feet are flat, and my asthma'sn Gn getting worsen G# An O think of my career, my sweetheart dear, and my poor oldn invalid auntn D7n Besides, I ain't no fool, I'm a goin' to school, and I'mn Gn working in a defense plantnnI've got a dislocated disc and a racked up backn I'm allergic to flowers and bugsnAnd when the bombshell hits, I get epileptic fitsn And I'm addicted to a thousand drugsnI got the weakness woes, and I can't touch my toesn I can hardly reach my kneesnAnd if the enemy came close to men I'd probably start to sneezenn(chorus)nnI hate Chou En Lai, and I hope he dies,n but one thing you gotta seenThat someone's gotta go over theren and that someone isn't menSo I wish you well, Sarge, give 'em Helln Yeah, Kill me a thousand or sonAnd if you ever get a war without blood and goren Well I'll be the first to gonn(chorus)