Here's a love song for Annie HallnWhy'd you go to California and leave us all?nI know Paul Simon was therenBut that's no excusenWhen the real only living boy in New YorknWas back home missing younThe Upper West Side will never really be the samenWithout your liberal-arts-educated neurotic philanderingsnI played tennis with younAnd I'm a JewnIn other words, simply putnI'm as mixed up at younSo Annie won't you please come homenYou're always gonna be alonenEven your analyst thinks sonBut he don't know how much I love younnHere's a love song for Diane KeatonnThere you are all suit and tie againnI've got a bone to pick with your agentnAdult comedies are really stale these daysnNo one goes out to the movies who's not underagenYou and Woody should team up againnThat'd be a dreamnBut Woody's doing just as bad as you meantnIt's really such a shamenSuch a shamen'Cuz Diane you were so cool when you were youngnWhat in God's name happened?nAre we all just destined to becomenMediocre and lame?nLamennWell I guess this isn't a love song for anyonenI'm just upset that everything was better before my life begunnNow I'm no philosopher but I just told a blatant lienBecause everything was and is the same and will be the same after I dienAfter I dienBut I like to think that if I lived back in the '70'snThat there'd be time for more sex and betternWoody Allen moviesnWoody Allen moviesnWoody Allen moviesnSo history won't you please come homenAnd leave poor Hollywood alonenI can always watch my DVD'snGod bless technologynMake everything old new for menMake everything old new for menMake everything so oldnSo new for menMake everything old so newnSo new for me!nSo new for menJust new for me