73
Dan Bern

If Barry bonds is really taking something
To hit make him hit more homers than before
They gotta throw him out of the game, sir
They gotta throw him out the door

Then burn the porn films with all the girls with implants
Burn the poetry by men who took lithium as boys
Your erection compliments of Levitra
Is hereby rendered null and soft and void

Then rip the contact lenses from your eyes, sir
You’re not really supposed to see naturally that well
No more flu shots or antibiotics
You’re supposed to still be sick my friend

In the future they say we’re gonna live
180 years, or 200
And you know they’ll be some jerk going around pointing
Saying you’re supposed to be dead, supposed to be dead

Disgrace by hint and suspicion
It’s point and cast a cloud of instant shame
And the president stamps the witch hunt with approval
And McCarthy gets sent back into the game

I’d like to now make a statement
I’d like to make a statement now
For a three-year period I was taking steroids
And my songs for that time are now in doubt

I apologize to my family
I apologize to you, the fans
I apologize to the very craft of songwriting
I’ll take my punishment with all the grace I can

God Said No and Black Tornado, throw ‘em out
I wrote them while the juice was in my veins
Everything I’ve sung since Fuck the Monkey
Go ahead and throw it down the drain

Imagine a world where everyone’s taking something
Imagine such a world then just for fun
Imagine the president’s taking smart pills
That’d be even better than 73 home runs

Disgrace by hint and suspicion
It’s point and cast a cloud of instant shame
And the president stamps the witch hunt with approval
And McCarthy gets sent back into the game

73
73
73 home runs

73
73
73 home runs





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Lyrics by Dan Bern

  Alaska Highway   All Right Kind Of A Girl   Baby Bye Bye   Baby Love   Beautiful Trees   Black Tornado   Broken Down Old Horses   Capetown   Carried Away   Chain Around My Neck   Chick Singers   City   Closer To You   Crow   Cure For Aids   Different Worlds   Don't Get Mad Get Even   Dreidel   Estelle   Eva   Everybody's Baby   Fly Away   Go To Sleep   God Said No   Graceland   Hannibal   Hannukahs of Long Ago   Hey God   Hiroshima   Holy House   Home   Honeydoo!   Hoody   I Need You   I Need You   I'm Not from Around Here   I'm Not The Guy   Jerusalem   Jesus Freak   King of the World   Krautmeyer   Kurt   Late Show   Latkes   Lifeline   Lithuania   Little Russian Girl   Live Another Day   Maccabees   Marilyn   Menorah   Monica   My Love is Not For Sale   Never Fall in Love   New American Language   No Missing Link   Oh Sister   Oklahoma   One Dance   One Piece at a Time   One Thing Real   Party By Myself   Presents   Queen   Rainin' in Madrid   Rice   Rolling Away   Rome   Smartie Mine   So Many Ways   Soul   Suicide Bomb   Superman   Suzanne   Sweetness   Swing Set   Talkin' Alien Abduction Blues   Tape   Terra Haute   The Fascist in Me   The Golden Voice of Vin Scully   These Living Dreams   Tiger Woods   Toledo   Too Late to Die Young   Trudy   True Revolutionaries   Turn on a Dime   Turning Over   Waffle House   Waffle House Hannukah   Wasteland   Welcome   When The Earth Had Two Moons   World

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