Tonight I'm posed and popping like a peacockI'm pressing flesh, I'm smiling big, my spinning head sings Stop, just stopCause what used to calm me downJust rips my life to ribbons nowSo I keep smiling, I find my window and quick cut outThese days my hangman's hunger makes my gut kickMy sleeping mind, could map it blindA flask, a key, a bag, a fifthI try to will myself awayWhile shouting habits plead their caseSo when the sun sears through my eyesMy beggar's brain can't compromiseI splash cold water, I draw the curtains, I stay insideAnd I can't say that it's a sickness, more like a stranger I ask inAnd later realize, was a stranglerSlipping nooses in my denBut I was lonely so I asked him, Would you tie that one on me?It wasn't his fault, I was eager, and I was weakSo as I inch towards resolutionYea I'm not sure which life feels rightA narrow noose or the wading waterThe hanging head, sore open eyesI know my brother he went one wayAnd at the fork I heard him sayDon't you follow, don't go making my mistakesAnd I realized what he meantDon't kill yourself to raise the deadIt never works you'll only end up joining them
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