Words Written Over Coffee
The Riot Before

Pages filled cover the floor all covered up with inknWords written over coffee document my strugglingnThose mornings spent sitting alone mourning alone in griefnFor all I killed in search of honestynnSee I used to be a mustard seed shouting at the mountainnI used to hang my head when it stayed far from the oceannI used to claim its failure and from the depths of depressionnI cried to god but god did not respondnnLike a barrel chested strongman I suspended disbeliefnI held it high over my head though all the weight was staggeringnBut legs buckled and muscles burned, in came gravitynI dropped it all, faced what I'd been avoidingnnFor many years I walked that road, for many years I triednSo earnestly I sought the relationship advertisednBut my empty hands, my empty heart, could no longer be deniednYeah I quit, I forfeit eternal lifennI did not take inheritance when I left to go awaynI did what was commanded when that rich man asked to be savednI left my friends my family behind all for heaven's sakenI am no prodigal and this is no mistakennSo I'm sorry mom I'm sorry dad, I really want you to be proudnDon't want to disappoint you all, don't want to let you downnBut I have stopped searching for truth hiding behind heaven's cloudnDon't save my place, of this race I do bow out

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