When I Win the Lottery
Camper Van Beethoven

Well I lost an eye in Mexico
Lost two teeth where I don't know
People see me comin' and they move to the other side
of the road.

I robbed a liquor store
To make myself at home a few times
Borrowed myself a car when I needed it.

I got me a shack at the bottom of the road
Fixin' cars and givin' tows
Spend all my money on the lottery.

When I win the lottery gonna buy all girls on my block
A color TV and a bottle of French perfume
When I win the lottery gonna donate half my money to
the city
So they have to name a street or a school or a park
after me
When I win the lottery

Never run a flag up a pole
Like Mr. Red, White, and Blue down the road
But I never called myself a hero for killing a known
communist.

Now I can walk into any old bar
Find a fight without looking too hard
But I never killed someone I don't know just 'cause
someone told me to.

And when I win the lottery
Gonna buy the house next to Mr. Red, White and Blue
And when I win the lottery
Gonna buy Post 306 American Legion, paint it red with
five gold stars.

When I win the lottery.

When the end comes to this old world
The rocks will cry and the rest will curl up
And God won't take the time to sort your ass from
mine.

'Cause we zig and zag between good and bad
Stumble and fall on right and wrong
'Cause the tumbling dice and the luck of the draw
just leads us on.

And when I win the lottery, gonna buy all the girls
on my block
Silver-plated six shooters and a quart of the finest
highland scotch
'Cause when I win the lottery, the rocks will shake
their heads and say that
God is good but surely works in mysterious ways.

When I win the lottery.


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Lyrics by Camper Van Beethoven

  (don't ya go to) Goleta   (I was Born in a) Laundromat   (We're a) Bad Trip   51-7   A Love For All Time   All Her Favorite Fruit   All Her Favorite Fruit (Orchestral Version)   Ambiguity Song   Axe Murderer Song   Bad Trip   Border Ska   Borderline   Chain of Circumstance   Change Your Mind   Circles   Classy Dames and Able Gents   Come Down the Coast   Come on Darkness   Come Out   Cowboys From Hollywood   Crossing Over   Devil Song   Dockweiler Beach   Down & Out   Down and Out   Eye of Fatima (Pt. 1)   Flowers   Folly   Form Another Stone   Goleta   Good Guys & Bad Guys   Good Guys and Bad Guys   Grasshopper   Heart   Hey Brother   Hippy Chix   I Don't See You   I Love Her All the Time   I'm Not Like Everybody Else   Ice Cream Everyday   It Was Like That When We Got Here   It’s Gonna Rain   Jack Ruby   Joe Stalin's Cadillac   June   La Costa Perdida   Life is Grand   Los Tigres Traficantes   Love The Witch   Lulu Land   Might Makes Right   My Path Belated   Never Go Back   No More Bullshit   Northern California Girls   O Death   O Death (Traditioal   Oh No!   Om Eye   One of These Days   Opi Rides Again - Club Med Sucks   Opi Rides Again / Club Med Sucks   Peace and Love   Peaches In The Summertime   Photograph   Pictures of Matchstick Men   Porpoise Mouth   Sad Lover's Waltz   Sad Lovers Waltz   Seven Languages   She Divines Water   Shut Us Down   Six More Miles to the Graveyard   Sometimes   Stairway to Heavan [sic]   Still Wishing to Course   Surprise Truck   Sweethearts"   Sweethearts\   Sweethearts\"   Take the Skinheads Bowling   Tania   That Gum You Like Is Back In Style   The Day That Lassie Went to the Moon   The History of Utah   The Humid Press of Days   The Light From a Cake   The Long Plastic Hallway   The Ultimate Solution   Tina   Too High for the Love In   Too High For The Love-in   Turquoise Jewelry   Une Fois   Vladivostok   Wasted   We Love You   We Saw Jerry's Daughter   Where the Hell is Bill?   You Got To Roll

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