I feel like a coffee mug nI feel like a missing sock nI feel like a quiet thud nI feel like an aftershock nI feel like the shirt you leave behind nWhen you go on vacation nI feel like I can't just let this slide nSo you are on probationnnIf I ever let you kiss me again nYou'll have to answer to my fist nIf I ever let you kiss me again nYou'll have to read the enclosed book list nIf I ever let you kiss me again nYou won't hold me to rationality nIf I ever let you kiss me again nYou'll have to change your whole personalitynnI feel like the skimmed part nIn a bucket of skim milk nI feel like the warm heart nOf a cow that you just killed nI feel like a delicious milkshake nAt a table of vegans nI feel like a piece of devil's food cake nPossessed by asparagus demonsnnIf I ever let you kiss me again nYou'll have to promise not to bite nIf I ever let you kiss me again nYou'll have to listen if we fight nIf I ever let you kiss me again nWe'll have to talk about morality nIf I ever let you kiss me again nWe'll have to change your whole personalitynnI feel like brand new strings nOn a piece of shit guitar nI feel like all sorts of things nBut mostly I feel like crap so far nI feel like I wanna sing a song nWhere the singer sings they're feeling sad nWe'll shit, we already are (You're right!) nSo let's make the last chorus totally radnnIf I ever let you kiss me again n[mumble mumble] nIf I ever let you kiss me again nSomething that rhymes with that nIf I ever let you kiss me again nWe'll adjust your terse mentality nIf I ever let you kiss me again nWe'll have to change your whole personality