The John Birch Society
Chad Mitchell Trio

Oh we're meeting at the courthouse at eight o'clock tonight*

You just come in the door and take the first turn to the right

Be careful when you get there, we'd hate to be bereft

But we're taking down the names of everybody turning left

Oh we're the John Birch Society, the John Birch Society

Here to save our country from a communistic plot

Join the John Birch Society, help us fill the ranks

To get this movement started, we need lots of tools and cranks

Now there's no one that we're certain the Kremlin doesn't touch

We think that Westbrook Pegler doth protest a bit too much

We only hail the hero from whom we got our name

We're not sure what he did, but he's our hero all the same

Oh we're the John Birch Society, the John Birch Society

Socialism is the ism dismalist of all

Join the John Birch Society, there's so much to do

Have you heard they're serving vodka at the W.C.T.U.

Well you've heard about the agents that we've already named

Well M.C.A. has agents that are flatly unashamed

We're after Rosie Clooney, we've gotten Pinky Lee

And the day we get Red Skelton won't that be a victory

Oh we're the John Birch Society, the John Birch Society

Norman Vincent Peale may think he's kidding us along

But the John Birch Society knows he spilled the beans

He keeps on preaching brotherhood, but we know what he means

We'll teach you how to spot 'em in the cities or the sticks

For even Jasper Junction is just full of Bolsheviks

The CIA's subversive and so's the FCC

There's no one left but thee and we, and we're not sure of thee

Oh we're the John Birch Society, the John Birch Society

Here to save our country from a Communistic plot

Join the John Birch Society, holding off the Reds

We'll use our hands and hearts, and if we must, we'll use our heads

[Background]

O beautiful, for spacious skies, for amber waves of grain

[Spoken]

Do you want Justice Warren to be your Commissar?

Do you want Mrs. Khrushchev in there with the DAR?

You cannot trust your neighbors, or even next-of-kin

If mommy is a Commie then you gotta turn her in

Oh we're the John Birch Society, the John Birch Society

Fighting for the right to fight the right fight for the right

Join the John Birch Society, as we're marching on

We'll all be glad to see you when we're meeting in the John

In the John, in the John Birch Society

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