she had an abortion that she made me pay for
The Drones

her life was a heartbreaking messnshe dug her smack and cigarettesni dug the whiskey and rohypnolnthat i stole from her when ever she went coldnwe weren't yet beat so we beat on ourselvesnand we rarely laughed and she often criednshe had an abortion that she made me pay fornthats all i gave her before she diedneighty dollars i had to peel off my thigh.nnits a long time now and i lay wondering whynlayed under my guilt like its an epiphanyndrowning in the heat of sleepndreaming a ghost with her mothers eyesni get nights walking down the wet streetsnthat run smoother than a bad habitndown past the park where the income came fromnwhen mine ran outnand i walk in a shadow with my theories grandnhow everything was out of my handsnit wasnt my doing ive got nothing to hidena ghost with her mothers eyesnnshe heard the change in my pocket as i was walking homenand she said darlin you look awful lonelyni said what would a whore like you know? seems like you never alonenthen she came out of the shadows to the side of the roadnand i said man you look like someone that i once knew oh lord she had eyes like yours!nand i stood there frozen but she was stiller yetnmy wits they hit the ground runningnthen the streets went nextntime fixed us like mortar time fixed us right therenand the whore and me we were all that was leftnshe said what do you mean i aint never alone?nive never met a single soulnill walk forever in blacknessnthe blind cant see until they get oldnthat aint so bad as looking at younnow that you looking at meni llok in your eyes and i know who you seenshe hurt you goodnbut she hurt me more.................n


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