Oh Helen (secret track)
Captain Everything

Oh Helen,
Do you like the smell of men?
Well I think that I might be,
Too some miniscule degree,
one of them.

I long to see you all the time,
I could fit you like a glove.
I'm so very much in love.
That I cannot find a ryhme with your name,
Nothing really sound the same,
Well except smellen, yellen,
and pretty much anything that ends with 'en'... well

Cut the crap,
I can stop thinking about you.
I'm in your trap,
You know you stick to me like glue,
Do you think I'm scary,
By the way I'm so full on.
How can you turn me down,
When I've got my medallion on.
Oh yeah

Oh Helen
I'm not like all the other men,
Wouldn't treat you like a hoe,
Bring yourself to love a mole,
And well be in heaven,
I can feel the love in you,
Call me up we'll have a blast,
I can so forget the past,
It the least I can do,
To love your eyes, nose, mouth, ears, tits, knees and thighs,
And arm pits, and smelly bits and pretty much every other piece of Helen!

Cut the crap,
I can stop thinking about you.
I'm in your trap,
You know you stick to me like glue well,
Do you think im scary,
But the way I'm so full on.
How can you turn me down,
When I've got my brand new cardigan on

Lets catch a movie,
I know you probably think I'm some kind of smoothie
I'm not a stalker.
But you can be my gravy and I'll be your pork oh yeah.

Cut the crap,
I can stop thinking about you.
I'm in your trap,
You know you stick to me like glue well,
Do you think I'm scary,
By the way I'm so full on.
How can you turn me down,
When I've got my brand new medallion and my lovely cardigan on...
Yeah baby.....

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