Mariner Fever
David Roth

I had a mild case of Mariner Fever
Not a very bad case, but a case just the same
I was casually intrigued by the citywide fervor
All stirred up by each baseball game

So I came home one night with my Mariner Fever
My wife was immune but the damage was done
When I turned on the game to appease my addiction
She went out and purchased a gun

Here's to Randy and Edgar and Tino and Junior
Dave Neihaus, the Groz, and to Joey and Jay
They're the ones who infected the Emerald City
With something that won't go away

I went to a doctor for Mariner Fever
She said she was sure it would weaken right down
When the astro-turf pollen inside of the Kingdome
Had settled in some other town

Soon the plague had gone eastward and made it to Cleveland
The folks in Ohio were not very pleased
They were up to their ears in some Indian virus
Systemically taunted and chronically teased

Here's to Sojo and Bosio and Benes and Blowers
To Belcher and Strange and to luck and to Lou
They're the ones who infected a whole population
Who had nothing better to do

So if you were afflicted with Mariner Fever
Remember that help is a phone call away
There's a 1-800 number for special diseases
Erupting on Election Day

It's a hot-line to action, the State Legislature
So ever-responsive with votes on the line
With emergency sessions to build some new ballpark
When the old one is working just fine

The old one is working just fine

Here's to Norm Rice (the mayor) and Lowrey (the governor), and Mariner Fever
And to all of the folks who stood up for the team
If they made the same effort to fight against homelessness
Hunger and AIDS
Unemployment, and ignorance
crime and confusion
Injustice, intolerance
Racists and drug deals
And domestic violence

That would be okay with me
I'd have Mariner Fever with glee

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Lyrics by David Roth

A Little Something More Ahmed al-Khatib Air of the Dog American Car Another Day at Moses Brown Bake Sale Be Kind to Yourself Before I Die Camp Grenola Cape Cod Catherine and Georgia Cheesecake Community of Faith Cutter of Stone Digging Through My Closet Dragon To Butterfly Earth Ego Trip Elijah Everybody Fateful Intersection First Class Five Blind Men Flag of Hope Foreign Guns Goodbye to My Dad Gush or Bore Halloween Hank & Hymie Heaven on Earth Holland How Do You Hold On To Love I Do Not Need A Bag I Have Learned I Would Fight For You John & Josie Just A Wall Kids Know Your Love Land of the Litres and Meters Legacy Lend Your Heart to Love Lipstick on the Mirror Little Christmas Song Long White Car Looking In For Number One Lost Wallet Waltz Lullaby Magic Pill Mailing List Manuel Gracia May the Light of Love Meatloaf Moonlight Piano Favorites Morning Person My Work Day Never Go Together New House in Orleans Nights at the Chez Nine Gold Medals No Apologies One Day at the Gates Pearl Diver Playing Catch Practice Makes Perfect Rise We Will Rising In Love Rocket Science Rosa and the Three Ks Satyagraha Seconds and Thirds Seven Wonders Some Kind of Hero Someone Standing There Sounding Spacesuits Special Penny Subscriptions Susitna Taller Than His Hair Thank You, Mr. Ryan The Armor Song The Dream The Jordan Waltz The Rance of All Compassions The Saga of Freddie & Sam Things That Do Not Serve Me This Is The Year Those Two Times Three Signs Time For Bed Trying to Dance Two for One in Podunk Town Valentine in Panama Waltzing Imelda We Belong Together What Can I Do Will You Come Home You Remind Me Zip Cord Rip Code

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