Here's to the ladies who lunch--nEverybody laugh.nLounging in their caftans nAnd planning a brunchnOn their own behalf.nOff to the gym,nThen to a fitting,nClaiming they're fat.nAnd looking grim,n'Cause they've been sittingnChoosing a hat.nDoes anyone still wear a hat?nI'll drink to that.nnAnd here's to the girls who play smart--nAren't they a gas?nRushing to their classesnIn optical art,nWishing it would pass.nAnother long exhausting day,nAnother thousand dollars,nA matinee, a Pinter play,nPerhaps a piece of Mahler's.nI'll drink to that.nAnd one for Mahler!nnAnd here's to the girls who play wife--nAren't they too much?nKeeping house but clutchingnA copy of LIFE,nJust to keep in touch.nThe ones who follow the rules,nAnd meet themselves at the schools,nToo busy to know that they're fools.nAren't they a gem?nI'll drink to them!nLet's all drink to them!nnAnd here's to the girls who just watch--nAren't they the best?nWhen they get depressed,nIt's a bottle of Scotch,nPlus a little jest.nAnother chance to disapprove,nAnother brilliant zinger,nAnother reason not to move,nAnother vodka stinger.nAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh!nI'll drink to that.nnSo here's to the girls on the go--nEverybody tries.nLook into their eyes,nAnd you'll see what they know:nEverybody dies.nA toast to that invincible bunch,nThe dinosaurs surviving the crunch.nLet's hear it for the ladies who lunch--nEverybody rise!nRise!nRise! Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise! Rise!nRise!