I Knew You Were Trouble Parody
Bart Baker

[Taylor:]

Once upon a time, before I was insane.

I dated this Disney guy, Joe Jonas was his name.

But he broke up with me,

[Joe:]

You're just way too creepy, plus I found someone else, his name's Mickey. (HO HO)

[Taylor:]

So, I wrote a song about his stupid ass.

Then, found this guy named John,

but that was over fast.

If you don't marry me, I will pull out your teeth!

[John:]

You're totally crazy.

[Taylor:]

No!

[John:]

Yes!

[Taylor:]

No!

[John:]

Yes!

[Taylor:]

Maybe...

He hit me with his guitar, and he said that we are through.

Just you wait, until I write a song about you!

Then, I met that Jake Gyllenhal dick,

and was obsessed right away!

[Jake:]

You've sent me 1,000 messages!

and that's just from today!!

[Taylor:]

Oh, that's because I'm having your baby!

[Jake:]

What?! But, you don't even put out

[Taylor:]

Stop questioning me, Jakey,

or I'll punch you 6 feet underground!!!!!!

[Jake:]

WHOA! WHOA!

Psycho, psycho, psycho!

[Taylor:]

Fine, go! It's good material

Next came Kennedy, I think he was fifteen.

I bought the house next door,

to watch you constantly, and also to make sure.. You never ever cheat!

[Connor:]

OMG! We are done, you are scary!

[Taylor:]

Harry was my last, that One Direction freak.

I taped him to my wall, so he could never leave.

[Harry:]

Someone call the police!

You're insane we are through!


[Taylor:]

You're just like all the rest!

What did I do to you?!

So I used, my stalker app.

To track down, all of those pricks.

The next song I write I'll use, their blood as my ink! Hey!

[Jake:]

Holy crap, that nut job just bursted in!

[Ex-Boyfriends:]

Ahh!

[Taylor:]

What the hell is this?

[Ex-Boyfriends:]

It's a support group for all the men.

You wrote songs about, you bitch!

[Taylor:]

What? I have not written about Harry yet.

[Harry:]

I am just planning ahead.

[John:]

Why are you even here anyway?

[Taylor:]

To finish you all off with my pen!

[Ex-Boyfriends:]

No, no, devil, devil, devil.

[Taylor:]

Oh, oh, It's true, I'm the devil!

[Doctor:]

OK! that's enough.

You were right, she's nuts.

You are coming with us.

[Taylor:]

Wait, what?

Get off of me, I'm not crazy!!

AH!

[Ex-Boyfriends:]

It worked!

This was all a trick, we knew you would come.

So, we hired this doctor.

[Doctor:]

You're going to an insane asylum,

based on the behavior I observed.

[Taylor:]

Oh, oh, Let me go, you assholes!

[Assholes:]

No! No!

[Doctor:]

Welcome to your new home.

[Mickey:]

Haha, so you're crazy too, huh?


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Lyrics by Bart Baker

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