Hustler Hall of Fame
Mickey Avalon

The road to the top, through crossguards and hard knocksnCopper penny times and endless city blocksnThieves straight as they never been crooked rent-a-copsnShooting craps in the back of vacant city lotsnFree-range circus acts and worthless factsnDancing in my solar soggy bowl of dick and smacknFist-fucking faggots at the White on gym matsnRats run the wire while I'm looking for a matchnI go back and forth just like a cameo songnHoneys wanna love me but the line is too longnI make 'em take a numbernWake 'em from their slumbernWhat you know about Mickey? n(He's a bad motherfucker)nTruckers get my digits off the stalls of rest stopsnI'm sick on the microphone like smallpoxnWild-eyed babies go crazy when I rocknBlind old ladies into diabetic shocknnIt's all the same when they call my namenMickey Avalon, hustler hall of famenThere ain't no ball and chain, to hold me downnGot a golden smile and a platinum frownnIt's all the same when they call my namenMickey Avalon, hustler hall of famenThere ain't no ball and chain, to hold me downnGot a golden smile and a platinum frownnnI flow like an acrobat, go tell your managernThat Mickey Avalon ain't no motherfuckin' amateurnI fly flicks with my dick at your cameranI rip the stick out my girl's Porsche CarreranI brought your whole formula, just warmin' upnStorm the frontline and then I find a spot for lunchnToxic-proof punch when the loot comesnRocket boosters with my boots onnUnderneath the tundra reach out for the ThundercatsnHolds no better than this brother actnI ripped the rubber mats out your lover's padnAnd kicked your mother's ass right in front of your dadnLast night, a brass pipe and a flashlightnSmashed my crown and left me down with a black eyenThe bad guy, walking over landmines, who can't die but still criednnAnd it's all the same when they call my namenMickey Avalon, hustler hall of famenThere ain't no ball and chain, to hold me downnGot a golden smile and a platinum frownnIt's all the same when they call my namenMickey Avalon, hustler hall of famenThere ain't no ball and chain, to hold me downnGot a golden smile and a platinum frownnnLeave your gods and your politics back at homen'Cause I just wanna drink and be left alonenI gotta girl who likes to talk my ear off, seenSo when I'm at the bar stay away from menDon't ask for a smoke or to make some changenI don't care about your kid or your menstrual painsnYou can call me rude but I like my solitudenAnd we don't need to chat while we're playing poolnSo stay cool mister, I wasn't lookin' at your sisternThat snaggletoothed sea hag, lips all blisterednNow rack the balls while I'm in the stallnPissin' out vodka and walkin' up the wallsnI turn off the ringer when my lady callsnDon't point your finger unless you want a brawlnI chalk up my cue and sink the eight ballnThen reach into my pocket and light a Pall Mallnn'Cause it's all the same when they call my namenMickey Avalon, hustler hall of famenThere ain't no ball and chain, to hold me downnGot a golden smile and a platinum frownnIt's all the same when they call my namenMickey Avalon, hustler hall of famenThere ain't no ball and chain, to hold me downnGot a golden smile and a platinum frown

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Lyrics by Mickey Avalon

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