My mind is filled with visions of death.
I've abandoned them to their doom.
I've fled the battlefield at the sign of defeat.
What will become of me?
We've walked into a trap, blinded by our pride,
all the brothers I have known died at my side.
And now I hide.
I don't know whom I fear most:
our enemy, or my father the King.
I dare not face him again.
What will become of me?
Too lost in my own sorrow,
I didn't notice the changing surroundings.
Can't remember how I got here,
I think I have lost my way.
I have been led astray
from the path that I was following.
The sorry state I am in, it feels so unreal.
I fear that the final victory will not be mine.
This burden causes my feet to stumble
like I am walking to my grave.
I wonder if I'll ever find my way back home again?
Will I live to see my children become better men?
The bitter tears I've shed
have clouded my vision.
All I see is darkness and death
on the path that lies before me.
I would cut out my eyes
if that would make it all go away,
but I think this sorrow is mine to bear
until the day I die.
Forsaken in this hostile land,
broken to the core.
This sorrow is mine
until the day I die!
I've long searched for death,
but couldn't find it, save by my own hand.
But my pride stays my hand:
I will go on as long as I can.
Though my heart yearns for hope,
I'm blinded by my stubbornness.
I fail to see my own path leads to emptiness.
Torn by guilt, broken to the core,
don't I deserve more?
I should have followed your rule,
oh Father, I feel like a fool.