When the party hit full swingnI saw you come reeling innYou had that six-pack in a strangleholdnNow you stagger, now you swaynWhy don't you fall the other waynCause I've got something here nWorth more than goldnnI said Don't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnDon't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnThey don't mend with sticky tape and gluenDon't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnDon't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnAnd that's my very best advice to younnCall me precious, I don't mindn78s are hard to findnYou just can't get the shellac since the warnThis one's the Beltona brandnFinest label in the landnThey don't make them like that anymorennI said Don't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnDon't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnUnless you want to wind up black and bluenDon't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnDon't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnAnd that's my very best advice to younnDarling though you're twice my sizenI don't mean to patronizenHoney let me lead you by the handnFind a lap or find a chairnYou can park it anywherenJust don't rest your cheeks against my mannnI said Don't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnDon't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnThey don't mend with sticky tape and gluenDon't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnDon't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnAnd that's my very best advice to younnNo shindig is half completenWithout that famous polka beatnThat's why they invite me, I supposenWaltzes, strathspeys, eights, some reelsnNow you know how good it feelsnCrank that handle babe, away she goesnnI said Don't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnDon't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnUnless you want to wind up black and bluenI said Don't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnDon't sit on my Jimmy ShandsnThat's my very best advice to you