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A Montage, Part 2: Nothing
Natalie Cortez

So excited
Because I'm gonna go to the High School of Performing Arts.
I mean, I was dying to be a serious actress.
Anyway, it's the first day of acting class
And we're in the auditorium, and the teacher,
Mr. Karp, puts us up on the stage with our legs around everybody
One in back of the other. And he says,
Okay, we're gonna do improvisations.
Now, you're on a bob sled
And it's snowing out and it's cold.
Okay, go!

Ev'ry day for a week we would try to feel the motion,
Feel the motion down the hill.
Ev'ry day for a week we would try to hear the wind rush,
Hear the wind rush, feel the chill.

And I dug right down to the bottom
Of my soul to see what I had inside.
Yes, I dug right down to the bottom
Of my soul and I tried, I tried.

Everyone is going Woosh I feel the snow,
I feel the cold I feel the air.
And Mr. Karp turns to me and says,
Okay, Morales, what did you feel

And I said, Nothing, I'm feeling nothing,
And he says, Nothing could get a girl transferred!
They all felt something, but I felt nothing
Except the feeling that this bullshit was absurd!

But I said to myself,
Hey!, it's only the first week. Maybe it's genetic.
They don't have bob sleds in San Juan.

Second week, more advanced
And we had to be a table, be a sports car ice cream cone.
Mr. Karp, he would say,
Very good, except Morales.
Try, Morales, all alone.

So I dug right down to the bottom
Of my soul to see how an ice cream felt.
Yes, I dug right down to the bottom
Of my soul and I tried to melt.
The kids yelled, Nothing!
They called me Nothing!
And Karp allowed it, which really makes me burn.
They were so helpful.
They called me hopeless.
Until I really didn't know where else to turn!

And Karp kept saying,
Morales, I think you should transfer to girls' high.
You'll never be an actress. Never! Jesus Christ!

Went to church praying,
Santa Maria, send me guidance, send me guidance.
On my knees.
Went to church praying,
Santa Maria, help me feel it,
Help me feel it. Pretty please.

And a voice from down at the bottom
Of my soul cam up to the top of my head.
And the voice from down at the bottom of my soul,
Here is what it said

This man is nothing!
This course is nothing!
If you want something, go find a better class.
And when you find one, you'll be an actress.
And I assure you that's what fin'lly came to pass.

Six months later I heard that Karp had died.
So I dug right down to the bottom of my soul and cried,
'cause I felt nothing.

I didn't want him to die or anything, but


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Lyrics by Natalie Cortez

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