[On the cb.]
Breaker, one-nine, this here's the Duck again. You got a copy on me Pig Pen, c'mon? Ah, negatory, Pig Pen, there ain't no way out 'cept for that one Atlantic Ocean. Now listen, drop them hogs off in Omaha and get over here in a short, 'cause it definitely looks like we got us a problem.
Bears to the left; bears to the right
We didn't have no place to go.
They had us backed up clean to the shore,
And them cab-over Petes don't float.
I says, Pig Pen, I got me a good idea.
Them Friends a' Jesus gonna save us!
So praise the Lord and Mister Ford,
And follow that micra-bus, ten-four.
[Now, imagine a bunch of rowdy pirates -- the buccaneer type, not software -- chanting the Chorus.]
[Chorus:]
Yo ho ho, and a thousand trucks
Gonna take a bath with a Rubber Duck
Yo ho ho, and a lots a' luck
'Round the world with the Rubber Ducky!
Yeah, we drove on the water like diesel whales
Sank about a hunnert-and-ten of 'em
I says, Pig Pen, they just didn't have no faith
They definitely gone ten-seven.
By the time we got into that Piccadilly Town,
'Bout half of 'em was lost at sea
I says, Break one-nine for a ten-thirty-three
What we got was the cotton-pickin' bbc
[Spoken, in a sorta British accent]
I say, Fabersham. Looks likes the Americans have got themselves another bloody Convoy.
[Chorus:]
Yo ho ho, and a thousand trucks
Gonna take a bath with a Rubber Duck
Yo ho ho, and a lots a' luck
'Round the world with the Rubber Ducky!
[Spoken, in the same sorta British accent]
Good heavens! Look at them all! Half of them are sinking in the Thames! Hello! Some of our truck chaps are assisting them. Good show, actually. Oh, well, ten-four and all that rubbish.
Well, we crossed that Channel like snakes on glass
And stormed the beach about dawn
I says, Grab your shifters and punch 13
We all goin' truckin' on the Autobahn.
Now, Pig Pen, this here's the ultimate slab
'Cause there goes a Mercedes truck.
He says, Break one-three for the Strudel Machine
Ya just blew the doors off'n the Duck. How 'bout it?
[Spoken, in a sorta German accent. A really bad German accent.]
Oh, zehn-vier, Rubber Duck. Ve are receiving you vall-to-vall, but the schpeed limit on za Autobahn is triple-nickels. You travel too schlow, Rubber Duck. We gonna see you around. We gone. Wiedersehen.
[If you know the song, then you can skip this note. If you don't, then a bit of explanation is necessary. During the next verse, the chorus (the singers, not the words) is heard in the background. What they're singing is what's printed in the tiny little letters. No, I am not making this up. That's what they're singing.]
Well, we stopped for a coffee in West Berlin
Dumb, dumb, dumb. This is
The British had hundred-mile tea
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
I says, Pig Pen, from here on it's wall-to-wall bears.
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb,
Says, Bash the Wall; we gonna see.
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb.
Well, them big red bears must'a been in the bush
Dumb, dumb, dumb. This is
'Cause we didn't see a one all day
Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb,
So we raked up the leaves and we shook out the tree
Dumb, dumb, dumb. This is
'Til they finally had something to say
Dumb, dumb, dumb.
You got it..
[Spoken in a bad Russian accent. A really bad... You know the rest.]
Comrade Duck: you have been given until daybreak in Murmansk to get your cotton-pickin' trucks out of the you. S. S. Of are. You will copy!
[That 'dumb' chorus continues.]
Well, we shot them rigs through salt-mine city
Dumb, dumb
With a hammer and a sickle on down
Dumb, dumb
Then we hit the fan through the Sea of Japan
Dumb, dumb
Tooled into Transistor Town
Dumb, dumb
I says, Pig Pen, this here must be the place,
Dumb, dumb
'Cause everybody's eatin' with sticks.
Dumb, dumb
He says, Ten-Four, this here is cb land
Dumb, dumb
'Cause my channel knob just went crick.
Dumb, dumb
[Spoken in a really bad Japanese (fill in the blank)]
Ah so, Lubba Duck. You have a nice day today, betta day tomollow. We catch you on frip-frop. This one Kamikaze Ozzie; we gone. Sayonara.
[Chorus:]
Yo ho ho, and a thousand trucks
Gonna take a bath with a Lubba Duck
Yo ho ho, and a rots a' ruck
'Round the world with a Lubba Ducky!
[Obviously, poritical collectness hadn't yet permeated the you. S. Of A. :)]
[On the cb.]
Ah, ten-four, Pig Pen, what's your twenty? Australia? Mercy sakes, ain't nothin' down there but Tasmanian devils and them Q-alla bears. What's that? No double-nickel limit? We gonna be there in a short, Pig Pen. This here's the Rubber Duck, ten-ten and doin' it to it like Pruitt used'ta do it to it. We gone. 'Bye-'bye.
'round The World With The Rubber Duck
C.W. McCall
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Lyrics by C.W. McCall
'round The World With The Rubber Duck Audubon Aurora Borealis Black Bear Road Camp Bird Mine City Of New Orleans Classified Columbine Comin' Back For More Convoy Crispy Critters Flowers On The Wall Four Wheel Cowboy Four Wheel Drive Ghost Town Glenwood Canyon Green River Hobo's Lullaby I Don't Know I Don't Know (& But I Don't Care) I Don't Know (and I Don't Care) I Wish There Was More That I Could Give I've Trucked All Over This Land Jackson Hole Kidnap America Lewis And Clark Livin' Within My Means Long Lonesome Road Milton Mountains On My Mind Night Hawk Night Rider Niobrara Nishnabotna Old 30 Old Glory Old Home Filler-up & Keep On A-truckin' Cafe Old Home Filler-up An' Keep On A-truckin' Cafe Old Home Filler-Up An' Keep On A-Truckin'… Old Home Filler-Up An' Keep On A-Truckin'... Oregon Trail Outlaws And Lone Star Beer Pine Tar Wars Ratchetjaw Riverside Slide Rocky Mountain September Roses For Mama Round The World With The Rubber Duck Roy Silver Cloud Breakdown Silver Iodide Blues Silverton Sing Silent Night Sloan Super Slab Showdown Take My Duds To The Junkman Telluride Breakdown The Battle Of New Orleans The Cowboy The Gallopin' Goose The Little Brown Sparrow And Me The Little Things In Life The Only Light The Silverton There Won't Be No Country Music There Won't Be No Country Music Two-way Lovin' Watch The Wildwood Flowers Wheels Of Fortune Wilderness Windshield Wipers In The Rain Wolf Creek Pass Write Me A Song
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